Overmorrow.

Did you know that the word overmorrow  is an old English word that means the day after tomorrow? That's also the oldest's birthday, the day after tomorrow, on the 16th and he turns 36. Oh, my gawd, I just can't believe I have a "kid" that's that old!! The photo above is his Thanksgiving dinner he made; some kind of fish(ewwww!!!  I hate fish, so he definitely didn't get that from me, but from both sets of my grandparents who ate fish) At first I didn't know what the gross little green things are that look like peas he said they're something called capers. We had our dinner yesterday too but without my mother here(and Buddy,too) it just wasn't the same as she was the "glue" that held the family together  and without her here now it all just sort of fell apart and she was always the one that made the biggest deal over holidays and fussed over the big fancy dinners, and always did the stockings for Christmas and the birthday cards,etc. Yesterday I just cooked the food and left it out and everyone just came and went and got it as they wanted but nothing fancy or formal.

As for me, I AM thankful we have enough food and our needs are met, even though we don't have any "extras" and nothing left over and all the $$$ goes to pay the bills at least we have enough for our needs so that's something, and I have the house and no debts and I'm thankful my mother's debtors haven't come after the house so there's also that. This morning I also smelled the strong stink of skunk and yesterday I saw a woodpecker too, but better than peckerwood!😃

I also have a "suspicious" feeling the almost 31 YR old ( in 4 more days is his birthday) might be breaking up with his GF! He's been home alot lately and I haven't seen her in awhile and they weren't even together yesterday for Thanksgiving and when I asked where she was if she was at her parents' he said he "didn't know" which I thought was weird,  so maybe my "bad vibes" about her was right afterall, and him stealing Beja from me (and  he's taken over him like he's his dog now) would also be like if his GF left him for another guy. How would he  feel? That's how *I* feel with my dog leaving me for him,too! Beja was someone I connected and bonded with and then he left me for someone else. 

I hardly saw him much all weekend either because he was always with him and yesterday we were in the living room and he chose to sit with him instead of me(which was hurtful) and wouldn't even come over to me when I called him and even when I went over there and picked him up and brought him over he still kept wiggling and squirming trying to leave and go back over to him. You have no idea how much that breaks my heart. I feel so rejected. Even my own dog wants nothing to do with me. My hubby also said he hasn't been charging him rent for awhile now since he's "in-between" jobs  and we've been doing ok without it so at least that's one less thing for me to worry about.

Whenever I say how much I hate this Shithole my hubby also always says Then why don't you move to USA with all the mass shootings? (already tried that once, no thanks) and I don't know why he thinks it has to only be Canada or USA; I mean there are so many more countries in the world to move to( like somewhere in Europe or in the Caribbean, for example) not just Canada and USA but then again his knowledge of geography isn't exactly the greatest. Next weekend he also goes to Quebec for another chess tournament so I get a nice 4 day break,too. Sometimes I think his purpose in life is to annoy me.

I need a break from my family and from my life.

There's simply nothing here for me.

Even in the darkest places, love finds its guardian. Two souls who had nothing but each other, now have forever.-Lalit Kaur Dhillon