Running With Scissors.(Formerly HippoRastaPotamus)

Sunday, August 9, 2026

Alone Again.

I was originally going to post this tomorrow but it's supposed to storm all day so just in case our power and/or Internet goes out I'm doing it now:

Last night the faucet in the sink in the third floor bathroom( the one I always wash my face in) basically exploded and the part the water comes out of came flying off and shot across the room and I got soaking wet. It had all eroded and so I told my hubby who said, upon inspection, that we need a new faucet and when I told him I like the "Old-fashioned" style( like the one we have here on the main floor and second floor bathroom sinks) he snarled, "You GET whatever's cheapest!" so I'm just hoping the one I like is on sale but with my "luck" I doubt it.

The cheap bastard.

Beja is also a traitor and I'm alone again.

As soon as he saw the 31 YR old was back he instantly abandoned me in a heartbeat(he hasn't sat with me at all all day today) and he even dropped my hubby like a hot potato as well, so even he must have just been the Consolation Prize...

and I'm the Last Resort.

I guess he never really was mine.

I guess I'm still not his.

I never really was.

Even after a year of bonding.

It was always just temporary until the 31 YR old came back.

I feel so used, like a non-entity now, and I can't believe after we bonded over the past year he can just dump me like that and it really eats away at me and nags at me and gets under my skin.

I'm NOT even my own dog's favourite person.

I guess some things never change.

It's just like it was before.

Beja also peed on poor Snoopy( pictured here) so I rescued him and put him in the laundry.

I can't believe he peed on Snoopy.

Don't 'diss Snoopy!

I also really wouldn't be surprised with my relentless and debilitating fatigue and constant daily pain(I also woke up at 5 am with a splitting headache I still have) and cough if I really DO have cancer, and likely it's spread and in the final stages, and I sure hope so; I wake up every day praying it's finally the day I die and am set free, and the 31 YR old's GF is also allergic to dogs, and ,and growing up they never knew we had autism, EDS, ADD, ADHD, Dyslexia, Tourette's, etc.

They just always called us "weird", "flexible", "don't pay attention", "Can't sit still", "stupid", "Can't keep quiet", "Disruptive" etc.

They didn't know that medical issues are often the cause.

The 31 YR old also took Beja for a walk today( it was actually my hubby's idea; I'm convinced he likes to "sabotage" me) when I was outside and they were inside and I told him from now on I'd like him to at least ask me first, since he IS my dog and also if I'd gone inside the house looking for him and wasn't able to find him I'd be in an utter panic. Him and the 31 YR old also spent most of the day sitting in my hubby's recliner chair watching TV and when I came up to them Beja even barked at me and that just broke my heart.

I really am all alone again.

All I ever tried to do was protect the kids and keep them safe when they were growing up as well,which I did succeed at, but at a great cost to myself but I would still do it all over again to keep them safe, but I still ended up losing them in the end,anyway, but at least not until they were grown.

At least the good thing with no one that loves me is no one will miss me or be sad when I die,either.

I need spoilers for my future to know if I end up happy, because if not, I'll just kill myself now.-Leo

Today's Pondering.

Yain.

Look who is back!

The 31 YR old!

It actually went well yesterday( and it's nice seeing him again)....except Beja ran outside onto the street again when the door was open moving stuff in and the first impression his GF saw of me was hysterical and frantically panicking running after him. Luckily I caught him just before he got onto the road and my asshole hubby thought it was funny and was even laughing at my panic even though him getting run over by a car is my biggest fear.

His GF seems nice and the complete opposite of his last one; she doesn't look trashy like the other one, who had heavy make-up, gaudy "spider" lashes and a huge tattoo that took up her entire upper leg and in fact, she wasn't even wearing any make up and she has wavy brown medium length hair and my hubby said she's quiet, calm and peaceful and NOT dramatic like the other one, and a good calming infleuence on him which is what he needs. She is even named after royalty( as are all her 5 siblings, and when I asked her if they're Catholic she replied, "No, my parents just failed at birth control.") unlike the last one who had a very obvious redneck name.

His GF also said she is the oldest and grew up poor as they didn't get their $$$ until later so the younger kids grew up rich, which is the opposite of our family; our older ones we had $$$ and then we lost it and the younger ones didn't have it, but the poor girl can't cook; she made chocolate chip cookies and they were all burned black at the bottom so it's a good thing the 31 YR old can cook and he's a really good cook, too!

Beja still remembered him,too, even though it was a year since he last saw him and he was still just a puppy. He was just sooooo happy and excited to see him again and he had the Zoomies and kept wagging his tail in excitement all day. He was such a happy little boy and he's lucky to have so many people who love him.

This is also all his stuff he was somehow able to cram into a small dorm room and it now temporarily lives in our living room until he can start moving it into his new university dorm tomorrow. I also told him he did a good job being the top of every class but I couldn't say I was proud of him because pride is a sin but I told him I was impressed, happy, and that he did a good job. I also heard thunder as I was sitting outside but didn't come in until it begun to rain( the 25 YR old used to call yain when she was little; it was so cute) as I like to live on The Edge. I saw my Angel Bird and a Monarch butterfly again as well.

I also notice the youngest hasn't been over at his friend's house for months now and they haven't taken him camping like they used to,either, and I had always wondered if his friend's mother was my hubby's mistress and maybe her husband found out and banned the 19 YR old from coming over as a result even though it's NOT fair that the kids are punished and suffer because of the parents' affair. It's NOT their fault and they're innocent in all this.

                                                But on my tombstone when I go
                                                Just put "Death by rock and roll".-The Pretty Reckless