Today's Thought.

 

The Pizza.

With my hubby away all weekend playing in a chess tournament I ordered-in pizzas for the youngest and I for our little treat. I checked out 6 places hoping to find if anyone had a Butter Chicken pizza but no one did and the only chicken pizza they had also had bacon on it so I ended up getting the one here above; the Mediterranean, with olives(I don't like so I just picked them off  but I ordered it online and couldn't request for no olives; it came that way) onions, tomato, Feta, Mozarella, and Pesto sauce. My God it was just soooooo good. I got a medium and there was 8 slices, enough to last me for 3 days and I got the almost 19 YR old a large pizza. Beja doesn't like him,either, and always barks at him and Buddy didn't like him,either, but he doesn't bother with either one of them and also doesn't like dogs so there's that,too, plus dogs can also "sense" it too when people don't like them or are afraid of them.

Not fair as well: both yesterday and this morning my hubby wasn't here to have his shower right before I have my bath and "hog" up all the hot water yet I still never had any.

I also saw this old photo of Buddy from a few years ago and I can't believe next month( on the 7th) it'll be a year already since he died but God sent me Beja to love and to help heal my heart. Last night I also noticed before bed I had a "dusky" grey/blue-ish colour all around my lips( top and bottom) and a 'bruise" colour ring all around both eyes as well, top and bottom, making me wonder if my oxygen level is low and my skin and eyes were really yellow as well and I look forward to going over to the Other Side and I can be with Buddy again and also fly like a bird, drive the orange Jeep, and finally find my dress so I can go to the party I think must be symbolic(I keep having this recurring dream I can't find a dress to go to this party as well as another one I'm wearing a sapphire blue long satin gown and meet my True Love at a dance) and all my other dreams will also come true.

I'm looking forward to it!

Yesterday I also got this from Twitter  as I replied to a question posted "Why would a wife cheat on her husband?" so I replied, "She's a skanky 'ho" and then I get this.

So, basically I got asked a question on the forum and then I get in trouble for answering.

Seriously though, WTF?

Below is also a view of my computer desk in my little nook in the rec-room and I heard on the news in Etobicoke( just outside of Toronto) a French Bulldog was attacked and killed by a coyote in its own so-called "safe" yard surrounded by a 6-foot tall fence( just like we have) which is exactly why I never  leave Beja outside alone, not even in the yard or on the porch, and since I have him I'm no longer "actively" suicidal anymore like I once was, but of course that can all instantly change if I get a major "trigger", such as losing my home or something or if he died but I still DO keep hoping that I just die naturally on my own though. That never ends.

I hate that my past actually shaped me as a person like I didn't consent to turning out like this bro can I get a redo?-Limerence

 

Sunday Stuff.

The amount of trauma I have from people I thought loved me is crazy.-Masha

I feel like I’m genuinely unloveable.-Mar

Suddenly I'm a little girl asking why nobody wants to play with me again.-Ash

I dont think i do anything right.-Dinostoned

My life is genuinely just a series of unfortunate events.-LittlePett

Be one with the Light and know you never die but awaken like the Butterfly to experience countless Realms of existence.-Robert Gilllis

I AM NOT FUCKING LAZY. I am burnt out, overstimulated, and have been carrying emotional loads for YEARS that no one’s ever helped me hold.. I’M TIRED.-HeavensBvnny

Who is Tom Brady though?😕

Music is my background beat to daily life.

Bro I really lost a lot of happiness in life.-Bxnt

Anyone who can’t hurt after a pet loss, don’t deserve pets.-Mandy

You need to always set filters before you allow people in your life.-Deep Sarkar

I’ve been an avid reader since I was about 8 years old and discovered what books can do, where they can take me in space and time.-Ree Young

I hate being around people, people suck the life out of you.-BasedBlondeExx

Thank you for being ours and choosing us to love you.-Tracy Armstrong

I get why Kurt Cobain killed himself.-Doxie

There's no place for someone like me on this earth.-Rupen

Slava Rossiya!

Trauma does not make people stronger. It damages the nervous system, disrupts mental stability, and keeps them in a constant state of hypervigilance. Telling someone they’re stronger because of trauma dismisses what it cost them to survive.-OrevaZSN

Did we all just stop having friends or it’s just me?-6ix

I'd rather die than live in pain forever.-Yuria

Being mentally ill is all about realizing that ur parents do actually think ur a disappointment.-Evernight Of Shedtwt

Nothing is enjoyable, fuck this life.-Soli

When she did lash out, it was due to the pressures of life being too much for her to bear.-Jean_Marie Valheur

Do you ever just sit there and realize that you mean nothing to anyone and you start feeling lost, alone, and unloved, and truly unwanted.-Anxiety

I'm just so tired of this. my body is tired, my mind is a mess. iIjust really want to lay in bed and never get up. i'm just so tired of life.-Anxiety