Much to my surprise, gratitude, and delight Buddy is still here despite his close-call with dying yesterday morning but he seemed fine all the rest of the day(except he didn't want to go for his walks but the arthritis in his hip was bugging him ,too) as he was was still eaing and rolling around on the carpet, playing with his toys, and even enjoyed laying in a rare winter sunbeam he found. You'd never know by looking at him that he almost died, or that he may have even died and come back from the brink of death. I kept a close eye on him all day and then again last night in bed I had him right next to me all night, always close-by to check so I hardly slept much all last night(it started with a big choking sound like he was going to throw up and then a loud almighty groan in his belly and then he went all limp) and last night as we were in bed it happened again around 9 pm: the exact same thing only the "death" part lasted even longer than it did in the morning and he lay there life-less in my arms and without any detectable heartbeat or respiration for the longest time and I was certain he was gone and I was crying and praying to God and begging for him to be returned to me, that I couldn't lose my best friend or live without him and be left here all alone, and I was all set to put my plan in motion to end my own life so I could join him when something deep inside me cried Bismillah! Bismillah! I don't even know where it came from, but it's Arabic for In The Name Of God, and upon hearing those words I swear to God, of all things holy, if I'm lying I hate hippos, his ears twitched in response and he started slowly breathing again and then "waking" up, and he was life-less, limp, and unresponsive before, and it was like he was resurrected and he just "popped" back up, alive as if nothing had happened and he lifted up his head and wagged his tail and by this time I was wailing tears of joy, amazement and thanksgiving and not quite sure what just happened but appearing like my beloved best friend was just resurrected.....OMG, I know it sounds absolutely crazy but I know it was real and it happened and it was so powerful and overwhelming and a sign from God. I don't know how else to explain it.
I know you'll laugh, doubt it, shake your head, and say it's just my crazy-ass hallucinating but it was real and I can still remember it clearly and I know the difference between sleeping and death and I've felt it as life slipped away in my arms before and you can clearly tell the difference between a deep sleep or even a coma and dying; you can tell the exact moment the soul leaves the body and can see the light in the eyes go out and can feel when the spirit leaves and not only does the body go limp in your arms but it also feels lighter too; you can literally feel the energy change as the spirit leaves and moves up and out of the body and all that is left behind is an empty shell as the life has left toward it's next destination and the "Beingness" is long gone; there's a very clear distinction, but I am wondering though if there is some connection to what happened to him and sleeping though, such as perhaps with breathing or heart rate being interrupted when he's in a deep sleep (like sleep apnea or something) causing him to "crash" as it happened both times when he was asleep....similar to SIDS in a babies...
I still don't think he has much time left though; I still fear it's soon and I'm going to enjoy whatever time I have left with him and am just grateful for this extension I've been given and spend as much time with him and making sure he's happy for as long as he does have left and to be there with him when the time does come so he's not alone. I can remember too I think it was back in July or so he told me he has cancer and he's dying and that would have been 6 months ago, but he's the best thing to ever happen to me, an angel God sent me to give me love, companionship and joy and without him I'll have nothing and no reason to carry on, to live anymore. He is my life, my purpose and my light in life. If he's gone I'll be all alone.
.My dog and I are kindred spirits. We are best friends and do everything together. We are a Team.We go together. We are in this together. I couldn't even define myself or my life without him in it.
-My most recent Tweet on Twitter.
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