A lot can change in 30 seconds.
I stare back at this red flag. Ceaseless denial and continuous rationalizations drown out my entire consciousness and sense of identity.
I, quickly, make it disappear. It goes back in my body.
My knife is sharp, yet dull. "To be or not to be", it loudly whispers.
I exist just to experience indefinite dread, indefinite internal degeneration, and worst of all, the debilitating self-awareness of it all.
My uncannily introspective nature that I adored is now my worst enemy. My beautiful gift of natural inquisition turned me into… this.
Every single day, impermanence… impermanence… mortality.
Living a life where you're constantly making eye contact with death. Practically having an awkward staring contest. What does that do to a person?
It's thin ice that I walk… but I've realized I've got cold feet. Will that stop me?
Avidly experiencing Methamphetamine-induced hyperthermia, I might forget my feet were once cold. I might continue tiptoeing towards my demise…
…But, maybe I'll get too hot and tiptoe back to a thicker block of ice to cool off.
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