'Lil Peanut.

Beja is like a little peanut and tomorrow it'll be exactly a week since I got him but it seems longer and he's just fit in here so well it seems like he's always sort of been here and he even follows me into the bathroom when I have my bath,too; he's like my little shadow! He's still timid and skittish around everyone else though yet for some reason he "took" to me right away right from the very start. Yesterday the 30 YR old's GF tried to "bribe" him with treats which he cautiously took from her but he's still wary of her. His legs are also so tiny and skinny his front legs look like chicken wings and his hind legs remind me of frog legs; not even big enough to look like chicken drumsticks! 😂 Yesterday we also got to be out in the yard for 5 HRS it was sunny and warm 19 C and today going up to 20C! I also hope he out-lives me because I keep losing everyone I love and I've had so many losses and "hits" lately I can't lose him,too!

I also thought of a cool band name: Gutter Clutter"  and my hubby told me the other night the 23 YR old and the 27 YR old went to see AC/DC in Vancouver(and the 27 YR old even came from Alberta, as did one of my hubby's brothers, who is their biggest fan and travels all over to see every concert ever since he was a teen and he's in his 60's now) and I think that's just so awesome, the lucky buggers(I'm jealous!) and I'm proud they have good taste in music they must have "inherited" from me, unlike the 25 YR old who actually likes redneck country music(I can't believe she's my kid!) which is just downright embarrassing  and she definitely didn't  get from me! My hubby scoffed, Oh, they "dare" to have their OWN tastes, different than yours!  to which I replied, It doesn't mean that I have to agree  with it and that I still can't be disappointed! I still feel sick,too( sweaty, dizzy, weak, faint, exhausted, etc.) and it's been a week now, and my anxiety is worse as well as now I'm worried something will happen to Beja, like someone will leave the door open and he'll run out onto the street and get lost ,or hit by a car, or get stolen, or attacked by a dog, coyote, hawk, etc.

I also realized I know that I really and truly am all alone in this world when the only one who really has my back is my dog.

and God.

Yesterday I also asked  a prayer to God to send me a sign that Buddy's ok and that he'll be waiting for me on the Other Side and within minutes I smelled the strong smell of the same incense I smell from the 30 YR old's bedroom window TWICE.....

Except it wasn't him.

He wasn't home and didn't get home from work until 8 HRS later

...and not only that, but at the same time  I saw my new Angel Bird ( the red & black cardinal)  singing me a song.

I took that as my sign and it made my heart smile.

I also laughed yesterday for the first time in a long time at a joke the 30 YR YR old and I shared over my hubby saying there's a singer named Charlie Pride and I joked he has a brother named Gay ("Gay Pride") and then the 2 of us were mocking redneck country music and cracking up laughing so hard I almost peed myself and I really needed that.

Remember we aren't the enemy here, and you guys aren't the victims, yet.-David Verge