Angora.

In Church last week I saw a woman wearing a white angora sweater(like the one pictured here) and it brought back memories for me: in Jr. High I had 3 soft fuzzy angora sweaters too that I loved: a light mint green one, a grey one,and a mauve one. I also had 2 cashmere sweaters,too: a grey one and a burgundy one. It got me thinking I should look into getting one now as an adult, to bring back memories and because they're so beautiful and soft and I love them so I went online and searched for Parkhurst ( the company that made the ones I had back then) and the company still exists and makes sweaters but sadly no more angora, and I couldn't find them available anywhere except used on places like eBay which I don't trust as many times the kids have ordered stuff off there and never received their items, I'm sad. I bet it's due to the enviro and animal freaks now, likely saying it's "cruel" or something, like saying don't wear fur.

Yeah....f*ck off and mind your own business. People can wear whatever they want. They don't need "permission" from PETA or anyone else.I wish they were still around though. I really loved them. I remember my mother saying too when she was younger she had a collection of Kitten brand sweaters.

I also bought more dried flower weed, 5 grams.Can you believe someone was actually outside yesterday smoking weed when it was cold and snowing?....that was me. My mother also made a snide remark how Buddy is my life but love is where you find it, and my hubby always like to snark to me, What have you ever done for me? too.....oh, nothing really.....just given you 11 kids and homeschooled them

ASSHOLE.

My friends are always asking why I don't just divorce him but the truth is I can't make it on my own, otherwise I would,and I wish I could but with my Asperger's, depression, bipolar, social phobia and now declining physical health as well I can't work and have no skills or any way to support myself and I have no $$$ and nowhere to go and I don't have the ability to survive on my own, such as to be able to handle banking, taxes, finances, etc. and need someone to help me. My mother wouldn't get rid of him,anyway,and,in fact, likes him more than she likes me and treats him more like a son than she does me as a daughter. I also needed his help in re-newing my medical marijuana license as they sent me 3 forms I had to fill in online and send back.....easy enough for most people but not for me, and it had to be downloaded and then something like converted to PDF file and how the hell do you even do your signature on a computer keyboard anyway and then once you filled them out how do you arrange it all and sent it back so they get the filled-in forms and not just returning the blank ones.....oh, my God, it's just so complicated and he just gets me set up and then leaves me part-way and I get stranded and I told him not to abandon me; that I needed him there the whole time, step-by-step to get me thru it because I know I need help and can't do it and will screw it up.....and then he gets mad at me for being so dumb and yells at me and rolls his eyes and sighs condescendingly at me....needless to say we have to get back to it again today. Everything's always so hard for me all the time and no one ever wants to help me and then they always make me feel so badly for being dumb and always needing help.

I also inadvertantly made a remark to the 24 YR old and he got really hurt and upset by it but I didn't mean anything by it or in a mean way.....but it turned out it exposed a struggle he's been dealing with but I didn't know it and now I feel really badly even though I had no idea. He has nothing to be ashamed about though, most people are  struggling with something, incl. myself, and I struggle with several issues so I know first-hand what it's like but I still feel so bad and I always seem to say and do the wrong thing all the time and get people mad even though it's not my intent and I don't mean any harm; I just seem to have this "skill" where everything always comes out wrong and people take what I say the wrong way and get offended. I'm pretty sure it has to do with my Asperger's but it always ends up making me feel bad because I don't mean to hurt anybody.