Petty.

OK, let me ask you this: do these 2 pieces of pizza look the same, that is to say, equal in size, or let me re-phrase it this way: say you had 2 kids and you gave them each one of these pieces. Would they say it was fair.....or would one complain saying he got the tiny piece while his sibling got the much larger piece? What do you think? That's what I thought and that's what I'm talking about. I put up this photo to prove my point: the other night when I was up in bed my hubby ordered-in pizza again and everyone had pieces like this (the big one on the left) and all they bothered to save me is the small puny "runt"-sized one on the right.(Usually they don't even bother saving me any at all but when they do it's always the crap stuff that's so small no one else wants it and it's just the left-over, like their table scraps) It's an insult, like saying that's all I deserve.

My mother said I should stop complaining and should be grateful I get any at all. That's her response,. Be grateful I get thrown table scraps and left-overs and crap no one else wants like a dog. I'm not worth the good stuff that everyone else gets; I only deserve the crap. That's basically what she's saying; that's all I deserve and I'd better be grateful for it. I'm lucky I get anything at all. Then she tries to "justify" it by sayingIt's just with the pizza, adding, You do get fed; we get you yogurt and a mango once a week....just for you....Wow.... aren't I "lucky?" I guess I'm fortunate they feed me at all and don't just leave me locked up in my cage and forget to feed me altogether. It really makes me feel second-class, second-rate, like an unwanted houseguest or foster child who gets treated worse than the "real" members of the family; the one no one really wants or likes but is forced to tolerate and has to feed and house but only the bare minimum and doesn't feed them the good stuff, the expensive stuff, the big slices, the juicy pieces, the fresh stuff, the quality stuff, etc.. that stuff goes to the people that are worthy,  that they actually like, but unworthy people like me that don't matter just get what's left over, the crap that's too small or dried up, left over, expired, or that no one wants... that is, if there's even anything left for me or they even remember to save anything for me in the first place. 

I'm sick and tired of always being an after-thought. I even told my mother I was going to take a photo of the 2 obvious unequal pizza slices and post it online to show everyone and she said they'll just think I'm "petty", trying to discourage me from showing the real truth of the way they treat me and the shit I really get, and I told her, Nah, probably they'll think they usually do, by saying my family treats me like shit and wonder why I put up with it.... I also remember recently when she got some piddly runt thing too and she complained herself (and it was only the once she got it and only because she was late getting to the food and all the good stuff was gone, not because she was purposely left out, and then she was compensated and given something else(yet not for me, I'm just S.O.L and told to shut up, stop complaining and be grateful) so it's OK for HER then but NOT for me? Whatever happened to same rules for everyone? Apparantly not....and why should I be expected to be grateful for always being given the crap all the time? it's like being grateful I'm "only" being beaten and not killed....Oh, thank you Massa for beating me and NOT killing me! I'm ever-so- grateful! One should never put up with, be satisfied with, accept, be thankful for, be grateful for, condone, justify, excuse, etc. being treated like shit, being treated less-than, being excluded, being made to feel Second-Class, being treated inferior, worthless, etc. KNOW your value and worth and fight for it. Stand up to those that tear you down. Demand equal rights. Don't put up with their SHIT. Ever.

As well, lately the thing under Buddy's eye has been here for awhile now, either as a fluid-filled sac that he scratches(it's itchy) and it pops open and a golden-colour liquid and blood comes out and his eye swells up with it intact or as a scab as it heals over, poor guy. Getting old sucks. I know how he feels. We are like a couple of old cronies, gingerly walking along slowly beside eachother down the street as we go for our daily walks. I'm not sure which one of us is slower. He is really grey now too(also like me) and his arthritis bothers him as well(also like me) esp. in his hip. My Dear Old dog is now 13 and when the Time comes I hope and pray that we both go together as we have such a deep connection and bond if one of us goes the other will be so lost and alone; like part of us is missing and the one left behind will have this big heavy empty void left in their life that can never be filled; that part of their life is gone, missing, and can never be replaced. I also hope and pray we will be reunited on the Other Side. BFF.....Best Friends Forever...