Deutsch.

When I was a kid I remember having Advent calendars but back then in the 70's it wasn't a well-known or commonly available thing; I had to always get mine at the German specialty bakery shop. We've always done the traditional European things incl. Christmas and I can remember in grade 3 my friend S who was German and when I went to her house they spoke German at home and how happy I was to have a friend I could speak German to, and our school principal was German too but I didn't like him; he almost hit my mother with his car; she was crossing the road and he almost runs her over  with his big green car with the white roof I think must have been leather and looking back I assume to be a convertible, and he never even stopped either but just drove off. That guy was sort of an asshole. I also was surprised shortly after my father(I hadn't seen him since I was 2 and they split up) died a mutual relative( my Babushka's nephew, so that would be my father's cousin) told me that he'd lived in Germany for several years(and my mother and I have been to Frankfurt) so Europe is deep in both our blood and runs in the family. I have a Rasta spirit as well as a European soul.....and a sorrowful heart.

I went to the post office to pick up my package( my weed) as I waited all day it was supposed to be delivered(and I was tracking the parcel and it said it was coming that day and I kept checking it's progress and location all day) and no one ever came to the door and even if we didn't hear it the dog certainly would have and barked and alerted us and he never did all day....so then around 7 pm I re-checked and it said unable to deliver.Left notice.... so I was like What the f*ck you stupid assholes....you DID NOT! I was waiting here all day for it and no one ever knocked or rang the door bell! and I checked on the door and sure enough there was a note....and I had to go all the way to the post office to pick it up because some lazy f*cker didn't do their job, CANADA POST SUCKS and I told the lady there what happened and she said she hears it all the time and that it's a big problem here and that many times they don't even have the packages on the truck and just leave the notes(WTF?) and she gave me a number for Customer Service and said that hopefully if enough people call and complain they'll do something but I doubt it; they'll prrobably just ignore everyone but I'm still going to call anyway because at least it will make me feel better telling them off.

I also have this throbbing and really bad pain on my right side under my ribs so bad I thought like I was going to faint and it's been for 2-3 days now and I know it's not my gallbladder( usually the most common cause) since I had that taken out 7 years ago and I Googled possible causes and it said liver, kidneys, pancreas,appendix, bowel obstruction,abdomenal aortic aneurysm, or cancer..my left arm also feels numb and sore and my legs hurt too like bad muscle aches and stiffness, and my lower back hurts so much it's like a 7/10 on the pain scale....shit...I'm so broken and I feel like the Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz, and.it's also our Anniversay on the 16th (I can't believe it's been 31 years we've been together; that's more than half my LIFE, and we're going to the fancy Indian place for dinner , the one thing we can actually agree on; the only things we even have in common are the kids and our mutual disdain for eachother.