Ferris Bueller.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off is my all-time fave movie. It was made in 1986 when I was 19. At first I thought it sounded stupid, about a kid that skipped school for a day with his friends but then one day the weather was shitty and I was bored and stuck indoors with nothing to do so I decided to watch it.....and it was the funniest thing ever and I just loved it! it was one of those 80's John Hughes teen movies. Yesterday I was like Ferris Bueller: I took the day off: I felt really shitty; I hadn't gotten to sleep until past 1 am (I was tired but couldn't sleep and the same thing happened last night too; I couldn't get to sleep until 2 am and today I'm so tired I feel sick)slept in an hour late and was running late all day, and I was dizzy all day and wiped-out tired and my depth perception was off; every time I looked down it looked really steep and hard to navigatre and walk, kind of like when you're really trippin' and my back and abdomenal pain was really bad and I napped for 2 hours and just felt so ....washed up....so I never made it to church, I could barely even have the energy to stand up. All I wanted to do was sleep all day I just felt so "woozy" and out of it. I didn't have a fun-filled exciting adventerous day like Ferris did though; I felt like I was fading away I assume is most likely due to my failing liver and kidneys. I wonder which one will "get" me first?

I also hit the bong to ease the pain and I learned something too: try never to cough into the bong as it causes the weed to get forced up and expelled out, and with such force it literally shoots out and it landed in the snow, all cold and wet and unable to be re-lit again. It was just tragic, and yes, we did get all that snow forecasted, and lots of it, deep and heavy and thick packing snow, and it's been over 24 hours and it's still snowing and all the school buses got cancelled today,too.I also went into the 25 YR old's room as he wanted me to watch a video he created and while I was there I happened to see my Christmas present he made for me: a little 3D hippo he made on his 3D printer and it was the most incredible amazing thing ever and I gushed over it, Oh, -----(his name)it's beautiful! I just love it and it's so shiny! I already know what my fave. gift is going to be this Christmas! That thing is awesome and esp. since it was hand-made with love, time  and dedication that it took and was put into it.

These are also the funky shoes my friend P in Australia got and I love them and they are just perfect for me and I'm hoping maybe I can get them (if they have a website and send world-wide) for my birthday. P is even older than I am too; she's in her 60's and is a multi- grandma!You're never too "old" to be funky and to have your own unique style. Who says you have to start dressing like an old lady once you reach a certain age? Pfffft! F*ck it! I know I never will and I hopefully will be buried wearing my Converse Chuck Taylor hi-tops. My mother also shocked me by saying I just make the mess, I don't clean! and her and I used to be quite close too,until my early 20's, until my hubby came into the picture(and I had kids) and then the two of them formed an alliance and ganged up on me and she's always taken his 'side" since then, agreed with him, backed him up, and vetoed me, over-ruled me, undermined me, and rendered me powerless, and with no "say", no voice, no authority, and no control over my own life. It's really sad too to realize that in my own home, in my own family I don't have an ally, except for my devoted, beloved dog.

Last night watching the news on TV my hubby also blasted the stupid redneck sports loud(I'm sure just to annoy me as he knows I hate it) so I listened to my music with the headphones to block it out but I could still hear it over my music(which I already had turned up to the highest volume) it was so loud so I had to keep telling him to turn it down.....and then him and my mother kept yelling at me to shut up and stop talking even though I was only talking to tell him to turn the volume down and I said he either turns it down or else I'm going to turn it off! They're always belitting and yelling at me for talking too much too and telling me to shut up but it's either an Asperger's or a Bipolar thing, in any case I can't help it and it's just the way I am and I don't know how to be anything else or anyone else even though I wish I could because everyone always hates me for being who I am.