Digging.

The 16 YR old's been digging; trying to dig up info on my side of the family by searching on the Internet and of course it always comes up blank, with good reason. She now thinks she's adopted because she can't find any of my relatives. She's not BTW, and we even have the same crooked toe and my cousin saw a photo of her on my Facebook and even remarked she looked like me when I was young to which she recoiled Ewwww! when I told her, and I clearly remember her birth; I was there, and she was born face-up with the cord around her neck.... so now she wants to order one of those DNA tests online that costs 200$(which is outrageous; way too expensive and how do you even know it's legit? They could just print off some standard report they send out to everyone and just take your 200$) and when she said she can't find anything I told her that just because you can't find something doesn't mean it's not there; sometimes things are just hidden, on purpose, and for good reason. Sometimes the past should stay buried and not dug up.

She also said I'm always so secretive and hiding from the gov't but if she only knew and understood my life and what I've been thru then it would all make sense but there's just so much that I can never tell her, that she can never know, that can't be exposed, that's just mine, that belong only to me alone; things that occured long before they were even born and before I even met my hubby, and I don't "owe" anyone an explanation or anything else. We all have our secrets and things in the past that need to stay hidden, that can't be discovered, that have nothing to do with our lives now, that need to stay buried and that being dug up will serve no useful purpose. I have my reasons and I don't "owe" anyone anything. I've spent my entire life trying to survive and for me this is just natural and an extension of it.