Fossil.

What does this look like to you? You'd probably say a muffin, just an ordinary, every day muffin. You'd be partly right. it is a muffin except it's a fossil; a fossilized muffin. At this point I can't even tell what type of muffin it is, maybe banana or perhaps carrot, but for some unknown reason one of the kids left it in the windowsill along the stairway going upstairs years ago,and when I say years ago I really mean years ago, as in at least 10 years ago, maybe even longer, but the real question remans how come it didn't decompose, rot, crumble, get all fuzzy and mouldy, or get eaten away by mice and ants? Why did it somehow end up perfectly fossilized and preserved? The only thing is that it's now rock hard, but other than that it looks like any other ordinary muffin all these years later. It's like some kind of miracle. My guess is the conditions must have been just right at the time to preserve it like that, perhaps maybe it was left out there in the winter and it froze, or maybe it's like bugs preserved in amber or something, who knows? Either way it's kind of freaky, cool, fascinating, unique, baffling, and funny all in one. The 25 YR old also tried an artichoke yesterday which I have always liked and also reminded me of that time my hubby and I were at a fancy restaurant in Ottawa and he wouldn't even try the artichoke and sent it back on his plate untouched, so the angry chef comes out to our table, telling him off, Is there something wrong  with the artichoke? Why didn't you even try it? Do you know how hard it was to prepare it? and he goes on and on scolding him and describing the delicate, intricate complicated method he uses in preparing it, as I'm laughing my ass off.

We also had another tree company come by to give us an espimate to remove the rotten tree as the insurance needs more than one estimate. The other one was 1400$ which we thought was alot....but this one quoted 3500$...holy shit... making me think maybe we should just wait and let it fall by itself and once it lands on the house then insurance will just pay for the damage and it won't cost us any $$$. Walking Buddy this morning something shiny also caught my eye under the bush next to our stairs and I looked closer and it was a 20$ bill and I couldn't believe my luck! It must be my lucky day so I picked it up and looked Heaven-ward and said Thank you Lord! for my good fortune, like a gift from God, and my hubby's off 2 more  weeks for vacation as well ( he's been at the company for so long he gets  5 weeks vacation time in total a year too which is impressive; you'd think we live in Europe!) but it annoys me him being around so much as he gets in my way and disrupts my routine, such as this morning doing my morning load of laundry he comes by and just turns  it off because he wanted to have his shower at the same time and he says the water pressure is affected and as we all know everything for him always has to come first. Cooking the other day the directions also said 3 1/2 cups or 800 ml but the print was small and I don't see too well so I thought  the 800 ml said 300 ml as the 8 and the 3 look the same when you're practically blind,plus I can't do math either so it didn't occur to me either that 300 ml couldn't be 3 1/2 cups when 250 ml is one cup.....so....needless to say I ran out of liquid during the cooking process......

shit.

I also saw my reflection yesterday in my iPod as I was taking this photo and I could clearly see how old  I really am and look now: age spots, wrinkles around my eyes, grey hair, saggy loose skin....staring me right in the face, there was no denying it and it shocked me; it's almost as if all of a sudden I just got really old looking and a part of me just died. it's hard to accept and understand because on the inside I still feel young; I still feel the same as I always did, but on the outside my body betrays me and shows my real age and there's just no hiding it. I sometimes wonder too if I was meant to be a man with my masculine features or if I'm just an unfortunate really, really ugly manly-looking woman, and I saw my old grade school( Bowmore Road) on the news last night too and it brought happy memories and a smile to my face asd that was one of the schools I really liked and I think I may have de-coded my frequent(esp. lately) recurring dreams as well where I move back to my old Toronto house and where it's my last day of highschool and as I walk out the door I yell, I'm free! I never  have to come back to this place ever again!! I think they symbolize when I die; my old Toronto house being the house I felt was most my home of all the 13-something places I've lived, symbolizing my True Home; Heaven, so moving back there is symbolic of me going back "Home", to Heaven, and the same for the last day of highschool and graduating; symbolic of my last day alive here on Earth before I go "Home" to Heaven,too. I eagerly look forward to it as my life has mainly just been about survival and it's NOT  really living; there's a difference, and I hope that my last dying thought will be something beautiful too, like flowers or an ocean sunset but knowing me it'll probably be something stupid like ass-f*cking, or I wonder what my last post on Facebook was? or I hope I remembered to water my plants, I guess it hardly matters if my delivery comes now, or I wonder whatever happened to Timmy in grade 1?