National Hippo Day!

Today is National Hippo Day!  I will celebrate accordingly. Wouldn't it also be a fitting tribute if I died today as well? It would be an honour. I had these weird dreams as well: one I was on vacation and the Big Brother gov't decreed I couldn't bring my beloved tie-dyed and hippo T-shirts back into the country and they're my favourites  so I was like F*ck you!  and I just smuggled them back in anyway, sort of like how one of my cousins used to smuggle drugs internationally, and the other I kept trying to pick up and hold a baby but with my arthritis I couldn't get a strong enough grip and I dropped it and it hit the concrete floor and blood seeped out all around the back of its head and I picked it up and saw the head had been cracked open and there was a huge hole in the skull and I was horrified but(and I feel guilty about this) my first thought Oh, God, there's no way I'm going to be able to hide this! My guess is it's my feels of inadequacies and failures as a mother coming out in my dreams and my now inability to do what I used to be able to do before all my medical issues came starting in my mid-40's. Now when I blow my nose blood also was in the mucus as well so I likely do have a sinus infection like I thought and I still get chest pains on and off and I woke up sweaty too and my clothes smelled really weird from the sweat too which has never happened before and the smell is so unusual I can't even describe it.

I can't shake this weird feeling either that the 24 YR old and her BF  might be breaking up as well just like I did before the 21 YR old and her ex-BF did: it surprised me when she moved out of the dorm into her own apt. and not in with him as he owns his own house and I thought they would get married when she graduated and now I also hear they didn't even do anything for Valentine's Day either, didn't exchange gifts, claiming it was "too close" to Christmas and "too 'many' holidays too close together" but that just sounds like a lame cover-up excuse to me and even if $$$$ is short you can still always make a homemade  card with love....something just doesn't seem "right" here....I also heard a survey showed a large percentage of people said they would give up sex for a year if they could get a vacation,and if so then someone owes me 14 trips, and Lindor  chocolates are sooooo good too I don't know if I should eat them or get naked, roll around and make love to them!

Today I was also speaking German to Buddy and then half-way switched and started speaking French and didn't even realize, so I really must be losing my mind, and the 17 YR old had lots of guys asking her out and I'd always told her all the guys would be lining up for her and now here we are( I told you so!!) and all yesterday and today Buddy won't leave my side and keeps whining as if he's worried about me and this morning even came all the way upstairs( despite his bad hip) to find me when I was having my bath too, but me being submerged in the water he was unable to track the scent and couldn't find me so he gave up, confused, and went back down stairs. I suspect he might be partially blind now as well, the poor old guy, and with my bipolar manic stage and anxiety in high gear lately I chewed offthe rest of my artificial nails I had put on 2 months ago and I mentioned to my hubby how Barbados has this 1 YR offer to foreigners you can work remotely there and get a visa quickly and he looked seriously interested and was asking questions for more info and it seemed like he was seriously going to look it up! That would just be soooo incredibely AMAZING TO LIVE IN THE CARIBBEAN for a year and what an experience it would be for the kids! ( my mother, the 19 and 17 YR old have already been there whern they were 8 and 10) as far as I know the only qualification is that you make at least 50K and he said he does so.....oh, I sure hope so! I could finally get out  of this shithole and live in the tropical paradise of my dreams! eeeeeee!!!

10 THINGS I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND:

1. Math.( It makes my head hurt.)

2.Abortion. I just cannot fathom how anyone can be so heartless to KILL  their own baby!

3. Ketchup on macaroni and cheese.

4. Racism. Why hate someone just because their skin is a different colour than yours or because they are a different religion or were born somewhere else? It's so stupid.

5. Bullying. If you don't like someone then just leave them alone and ignore them but don't be an asshole.

6. Vinegar. On fries, on chips, on anything. It just smells like stinky feet. Gross.

7. Obsession with sports. It's so boring, so meaningless. I mean, who cares who wins some stupid game. Of all the important issues going on in the world sports is NOT a priority.

8. War.

9. The fascination with Anime and super heroes. I think it's just lame.

10. Pedophilia.

Don't get crazy with me. I'm better at it.