The Daily Struggles Of A Depressed Person.

THE DAILY STRUGGLES OF A DEPRESSED PERSON:

1. Everything  is a chore, even the simplest daily thing, such a waking up, getting dressed( why bother?) making your bed( what's the point?) brushing your teeth,etc. It's all such a huge effort.

2. It always feels like you have this dark big black heavy cloud of gloom always hanging over you, always following you everywhere and it's never sunny where you are either; it's just always cloudy and it only ever rains.

3. It feels like you've fallen down this big empty, hollow, endless black hole, this endless pit, that you just can't seem to ever climb back out of, no matter how hard you try.

4. You feel like you're just precariously hanging there off the edge of a cliff by the tips of your fingers, desperately trying to hold on..

5. Everything is just one huge big fog.

6. You are listless and have zero energy and no motivation.

7. Nothing matters anymore, nothing interests you anymore, not even the things you once loved and enjoyed and liked doing.

8. You no longer care about anything.

9.You lose all hope.(I find this is the worst and that's when suicide creeps in, that nothing's ever going to chnage or get better and you just want the pain and suffering to end)

10. You feel really, really alone and lost in the world.

11. You wonder why you exist, you wish you didn't exist, you curse your existance, and you wish you were dead and you pray for death.

12. You just feel stuck. The rest of the world goes by, life goes on all around you, other people are happy, have normal, happy, fulfilling lives, and there you are, and you wonder what's wrong with you and why can't you be like them and why can't you just be happy,too?

13. You wish you were someone else with someone else's life.

14. It feels like everything in your life and your world is all collappsing and crashing down all around you and there's nothing you can do about it.

15. You forget what being happy even feels like.

16. You no longer want to go out anywhere or do anything or visit anywhere anymore; you just want to stay home all day and sleep.

17. You move slowly, you think slowly, you eat more or not much at all, you sleep more or not much at all, you cry alot, you want to be alone, you want to disappear, you just want to curl up inside yourself and withdraw away from the world, you wish you could find something to just take the pain away.

18. Life feels black and white, all colour has been erased.

19. Life is flat and one-dimensional.

20. Nothing has any meaning, purpose, point, or joy anymore.

I owe myself an apology for putting up with what I didn't deserve.