Killer Chair.

This morning my chair at the kitchen table tried to kill me as I was sitting there having breakfast. Buddy was sitting on my lap as he has been lately as well( thank God he wasn't underneath my chair or snuffling around under the table or anything or I would have landed on top of him and he would have been crushed to death having a big fat hippo like me land on him!!!) and all of a sudden the chair cracked and broke and before we knew it, could do anything or get off the chair collapsed and buckled from underneath us and down we went; I fell backwards landing on my back and hitting my back  and the back of my head and feeling hard wooden chair parts digging into my back but despite that I was aware that during the entire time I never let go of Buddy; I always held on to him and didn't let go, not even to save myself but at some point he was still able to jump off and escape but I hope he didn't get hurt( that's what worries me the most, more than if I myself am ok but he seems ok so far anyway but he was scared). It was scary I have to say, and now I'm really stiff and sore( as if I wasn't enough before already with my arthritis) so I guess the poor chair just couldn't take the weight of my fat ass. I remember years ago back in Ottawa I had a chair that kept trying to kill me,too and I named it the Killer Chair; that one was one of those fold-up garden chairs and every time I would attempt to lay down in it, it would snap and fold up trapping me inside and flip over sort of like a mouse trap only for people.

I'm worried about Buddy as well; he's had a bit more blood in his shit, and he's losing more bottom teeth but not only that but also part of his gums are also all rotten and eaten away and just falling off,  and it looks so painful and he didn't eat anything yesterday due to it and today he barfed up stomach acid(I assume from not eating) and I even tried hand-feeding him and put dental Anbesol on his teeth and gums to numb it I feel so sad for him and he looks sad too I can see it in his eyes so I cuddle him extra to comfort him and I wonder if it's some sort of cancer; I mean, what else literally eats away at your face ( such as the sore that keeps eating away at his face he's had about 18 months now too despite me cleaning and disinfecting it all the time) and I give him the CBD oil for pain. I just love him so much and it hurts to see him like this.  My mother also actually set a reminder on the Google Home Device every day to remind her to feed the squirrels too, can you believe it? She's soooo obsessed with those stupid things, even though they live in our roof and destroy stuff, so maybe she's trying to somehow "bargain" with them, like paying "protection" money or something so they'll leave us alone?

The oldest also asked me if pregnancy cravings are the same or any different than "Munchies" from smoking weed  and I told him for me anyway the cravings were more specific and more extreme, as in, I needed what I craved right away and it  had to be certain things such as garlic, donair, pizza, Chinese dumplings, oatmeal( cereal or cookies) chocolate, etc. the exact thing right at that time, whereas after weed(for me,anyway) it's just more of a general hunger but at times I do have an intense need for chocolate. I also still never heard back from the florist that ripped me off depite repeated requests for a full refund so just have to contact the credit card company and have them stop the payment plus I also posted a bunch of scathing reviews online and filed a report with the Better Business Bureau warning others not to deal with them and it also made me feel better at the same time,too.I'd also feel better if they were met with a most unfortunate case of arson.HA!

I came across something as well that makes me wonder if my Thymus gland might have some issues causing some of my symptoms( perhaps maybe even something like Myasthenia Gravis?) which might explain things and is more likely inpeople like me with Rheumatoid Arthritis whose immune systems attack themselves. I keep searching until I find something to explain what's going on, what's happening to me, what's causing my symptoms and maybe eventually I'll be able to figure it out, and I figure too people hate me either because I'm a Marxist or because I'm crazy but I won't "apologize" for being Marxist and I can't "help" it I'm crazy and my dog and my weed are literally the only things giving me joy these days. I also decided for my charity to donate to this Lent I'll give to Global Medic who does disaster relief all over the world. Last year it was the local food bank. Even though I don't have much $$$ to spare I figure there's always others that have much less.

I'm in an abusive relationship with life but I'm too afraid to leave.