Lucky 13.

My mother has always said that the 13th is a bad luck day for her, and it doesn't necessarily have to be a Friday the 13th, but just any 13th as she got married on the 13th, lost a job on the 13th, among other things I can't remember and yesterday was the 13th but for me it actually ended up to be a good day, a lucky 13 and for me that's monumental as I normally have bad luck just in general so to have 2 good things happen both in the one same day is simply unheard of but yesterday on the 13th I got my Income Tax return back.....and I got over 300$ (to me that's alot of $$$!) I wasn't expecting because I NEVER get anything back so it was a nice welcome and much-needed surprise and I'll save it for when I need something(or for an emergency) and so then I was also to submit my statement to my medical marijuana supplier to apply for Compassionate Pricing to prove I'm poor to get a 20% discount off every order and I was approved!! Yay! Poverty rocks!! Finally, something good  about being poor!! It didn't take them long to approve it, I guess; they would have looked at my return, seen a bunch of zeros and said, OK, she's poor, approved.next! It's funny too when I was a kid I used to think people were rich if they(1) Had diningroom table and chairs (2) Had fine chinaware (3) Had a pool but now I think they are if they: (1) Own a yacht or private jet (2) Live in an exclusive neighbourhood (3) Are members of a Country Club. We have all of the first items and even when we did used  to have $$$ and some people would have called us "rich" before we still didn't have anything in the second catagory; we weren't anything near that rich!

The weather's been sooo weird lately as well; nice and warm in the daytime 18C (and going up to 21C for the next week!) but a cold 1C and frost overnight still, and yesterday as I was laying out in the sun working on my tan( and my doctor said the other day the weird blotchy pink and white spots visible on my tanned brown skin on my forehead I thought looked like Vitiligo is Solar Keratosis) I got so unusually sweaty and my B.O was bad like never before( maybe hormonal or something? Maybe menopause or my pituitary tumour?) so I spritzed my arm-pits with a spray of Febreze air-freshner and I figure I'll never be pretty but I can at least have a nice tan and funky hair( and with it getting warm now I'm considering going back to my signature Buzz-cut again for the summer again,too) and I can always be unique. I also define freedom as being able to sit outside in the sun smoking a joint with my titties out and being able to swim naked in my own pool. Smoke reefer and free your mind and your soul!

I think my new natural garlic supplements might be starting to work as well as for the past couple of days my joint pain is better and less(unless I'm just having good days as it's better when it's mild and worse in the cold or rain) and my knees don't hurt now when I go up and down stairs and my ankles no longer loudly crack every time I move them, and if it is a pituitary tumour causing everything then once it's removed I should also be able to get off most of my medications and supplements too and have a normal pain-free life again and I'd always suspected I may have had a brain tumour but no one ever believed me before....until now. I also saw the funniest thing yesterday,too: a neighbour's big dog was jumping on a trampoline in their yard and I kept seeing it's head bouncing up and down from over the other side of the fence!

Yesterday my mother was also sitting  out on the front porch when she spied one of the neighbours had put out a couple of lawn chairs out on the curb for garbage pick up so she told me to go over there and get them as she has the walker and can't walk that far and it was embarrassing and humiliating but I did it anyway or else I'd have to hear her endless neverending berating me of how I never help her, etc... and I felt so humiliated, being a garbage picker. So this is what I've been reduced to and what my life is now. I felt like a beggar and I told her she owes me big for this, for having to debase myself like that and lower my dignity by picking garbage and she replied You did that long ago! WTF? What a bitch! Just for that I should have gone and put the chairs back! I also missed when I tossed some garbage into the garbage can and it bounced off the rim and landed on the floor which she, of course, was quick to jump on and chide me for and I told her I'm very well aware of my deficits and failures thank you very much, and I don't need her to always remind me all the time what a failure I am and she smirked But sometimes you need reminding! I swear, I can imagine even God Almighty Himself must look down on her at times and shake His head and go, What am I going to DO  with this one? The best years of my life were also 1978 and 1979 and then in 1980 when I turned 13 all the bullying started and that's when it all turned to shit and  I would never really know happiness again and my life would be forever be changed and life as I once knew it would be over forever.

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.- Mark Twain.