Daze Of Spring.

These are fresh-cut tulips from our front garden I picked yesterday before some f*cker comes by and picks them which they always do. There's still 12 or so left to open so even if they get stolen at least this way we still end up having some we can enjoy inside. The lilacs will be blooming soon too which have always been my fave. and I'll have to go and get some and I had always dreamed as a kid would be in my bridal bouquet but I was married in December and we did it on the Cheap and  I never had a bouquet so maybe I can get them for my funeral and since most people in my family do die in May(lilac season) the chances are good... I also saw 2 squirrels mating and he kept chasing her up and down a tree and all around; she was making him work for it; he had to earn her, she's not easy! HA! You go, girl! I'll also be planting my sunflowers next weekend, the traditional planting weekend once the frost risk has safely passed. I heard a radio ad for a tax-break company too and I thought how about an offshore account; a tax-haven in Switzerland or the Cayman Islands? That's an easy solution to tax problems....

Yesterday as I was sitting out on the back porch I also felt a bug crawling on my leg I assumed was an ant but I looked first before I flicked it off in case it was a wasp(as I don't want to get stung) and it was a tick on the inside of my pant leg!   I was also heart-broken to hear the CNE (the "Ex") has been cancelled yet again this summer too(it's the highlight of my entire year I look forward to all year and now my entire summer is ruined) like it was last summer due to COVID, along with all other Toronto summer festivals, events, concerts, amusement parks, etc. even though the virus rates are going down,  and most of the sheeple are getting vaccinated so it's really NOT about that; it never has been; it's really all just about control, compliance, submission, conformity and obedience to the State. Buddy also scared the utter shit out of me this morning too; he looked dead all floppy and laying on his back with his eyes half-open and part of his tongue hanging out and it made my heart jump and I panicked and shook him and he jumped startled and looked at me with shocked stunned surprise like WTF, man, I was trying to sleep!!!

I also got sunburned again and I cut my hair into my signature Buzzcut again for the summer heat and I've been sweating profusely lately now like never before,too, , and I found out a blog I enjoyed reading and she stopped posting a couple of months ago is now back again! Yesterday I had a "feeling" to just go and check it even though I haven't since February or so since she stopped posting.....and there were a whole bunch of new posts; she had changed her mind and begun re-posting again just 2 weeks after deciding to stop her blog( and I'm glad she did!) so I had lots to catch up on but I enjoyed it,(and I love reading; I always have) and on the season finale of a TV show I watch we found out a beloved character has lung cancer as well  and I'm really sad about it, way more upset about it than I should be and I have to keep reminding myself that it's not real; it's just a TV show, and they're just acting and they're really OK, but with my Aspergers and/or Bipolar I can have trouble distinguishing sometimes between what's real and what's just pretend/fantasy.

If I do have a pituitary tumour that's also a kind of brain tumour( I have often suspected I had but no one ever believed me until now) it might also explain my seizures as well and hopefully my family will also be a bit more understanding, forgiving,and compassionate towards me and my forgetfulness,lethargy, fatigue( they call "laziness") brain "fog", and inability to be able to do the things I used to do, etc. and I thought I was imagining it too that my fingers were looking longer( they used to be short stubby things but now they look longer and my rings no longer fit,either) but I found out with such a tumour bones in adults grow  such as hands, feet and face and larger hands and feet and coarse facial features(making me look even more masculine, as if that's ALL I need!!) result and I also notice my shoe size grew by 2 sizes but I just always thought it was due to my edema...maybe this is the answer to all my symptoms and ailments? Do we finally have an answer at long last?

I'm sorry, so sorry I give my life a try Forgive me, forgive me I didn't say goodbye. -Ozzy Osbourne "Goodbye".