Why Are You Bald?

Last night as we were sitting in the living room watching the news the 14 YR old looks over at me quizically and goes, Why are you bald? and I said to him I did my Buzzcut again because it's so hot out,and I'm NOT "bald"; bald would mean no hair at all; I have hair; it's just really short. Then he asked if he was the first one to notice and I told him I don't know if he was the first one to notice or not but he was the first one to say anything. It's not really that much of a difference though to what I had before; just 1 size lower on my shaver clippers as it already was really short before. I always feel the most like Me, like my Old Self with a Buzzcut too, the most free and unencumbered, just like I also do naked( tanning topless, for example, or swimming nude) but that's not quite so easy to pull off in public though. I often sleep topless too( in the heat of the summer) which reminds of that time I was in Cuba, sleeping topless laying on the top of the bed having my mid-day siesta and the maid walked in and shrieked and I don't know who was more embarrassed, me or her! I also had maaaajor diarrhrea on that trip too, probably from eating all those mangoes!

Today I also woke up with this massive headache I still have and feel sick to my stomach too( likely due to the headache; when I get really bad ones I get sick,too) likely as we're supposed to get a thunderstorm and my head is like a barometer; whenever the air pressure drops before it rains I always get a headache, and I also noticed a big "dent", groove, or indentation in my right leg too, just above the ankle, where my big parrot tattoo is and it's not on the other leg, so I wonder if it's anything to be concerned about or if maybe that's just how a leg is supposed to look once the swelling of bad edema goes down now my diuretic dose got doubled? It's been so long I don't even remember what ankles even look like!!  I also will try, when I die, to send down massive sunflowers to my family, growing in our garden in the backyard, as tall as 8-10 feet, as a "sign" to them that I made it, that I'm OK and I'm finally happy.

I'm also finally going to get a decent computer soon too instead of this piece of shit that makes loud grinding noises and takes 5-10 minutes to load each page and is slower than Jesus' Second Coming(which I wonder may be imminent, esp. given that Blood Moon we just had which is a sign of the Last Days; the moon will turn to blood....) as my hubby got a new computer so he passes his old one down to the 14 YR old who then passes his old one down to me, so to me it's "new" and even though used still better quality and faster than my piece of shit and even though it hurts that I'm always at the end when things get passed down I'm glad at least that I can finally just get rid of this piece of shit at last and get something decent that works because I sure as hell can't afford to buy a new one!. I can't believe either how the price of wood has something like tripled when this country is practically made  of wood and lumber is one of the top exports and this country is also one of the world's top timber exporters, and everything deep down inside me just screams everything about the pandemic and the vaccines are all just wrong and soemthing isn't right,too, and we're being "played". It all just goes against all my instincts and all my Red Flag warnings are all going off big time,too,sort of like my dog when the fur on his back goes up the wrong way...

The future is inspired by the past.