The Books.

My hubby recently cleaned out some old books he had on his bookshelf  in his old office and he donated some of them to a used bookstore to sell ( supporting local business, right, plus he knows the owner) but some he couldn't use so he brought them back here and he'll just throw them out, the ones shown here and alot of them are all moldy, previously had been wet(from being in the basement and sometimes it floods) and hardened or (in the case of computer books) simply outdated and it makes me sad to see the old unwanted books now sitting abandoned out on the front veranda and it reminds me of myself in a way,too; a moldy oldie, tossed aside, no longer any use to anyone, unwanted, all used-up, outdated, faded, wrinkled up, withered, stained, worn out, torn, just waiting to be thrown out, just taking up space. It's a sad sight to see them out there just waiting to die and I can sympathize with them. I don't know if that's an autism thing or an Empath thing. Buddy also barfed on my bed this morning and there was a bunch of pasta noodles I had to clean up and he had this really sad guilty face but he couldn't help it if he was sick,the poor thing, so I clean it up and picked him up and cuddled him and told him it was OK. I think he just ate too much yesterday(after not eating before) and made a pig out of himself. I also checked what it means that he always licks my legs so much and Google  said it means that he really loves me and it's a sign of deep affection! Aww!! 💓😍

The 14 YR old also was finally able to go to the barber and get his hair cut yesterday and I asked him if he put deoderant on before( he tends to forget) and he snarled at me to shut-up which is why I much prefer dogs to people; when I talk to my dog he wags his tail at me and isn't mean, and yesterday walking Buddy I met this woman walking her dog who was heavily pregnant and she said it's her 9th baby but Child Welfare took 7 of her kids and she said it so non-chalantly,too, so casually, as if it was just an ordinary every day thing, and it just broke my heart. It was just so sad and I felt so badly for her and I couldn't stop thinking about her all day(Child Welfare does NOT "help"; they destroy families and yet another example of over-reaching invasive tyrannical Big Brother gov't that intrudes upon people's lives)) and when I said she doesn't look old enough to have 9 kids ( she has a cute short Pixie  haircut, pale blue eyes, not a stitch of make-up and looks really young, like about 16) she said she's 27 and had her first baby at 15(wow......holy shit....just wow....) and she had this child-like innocence about her, it was just so .....sorrowful, and it made me feel old,too, as she's 27(the same age as some of my kids) and to me she felt like a "girl".

I wonder as well since I'm successful in growing sunflowers how well I might do growing my own Cannabis as it would save me alot of $$$$$ if I didn't have to buy  my medical marijuana every month, although I've heard too it's a very complicated plant to grow and that it reqires strict and specific temps, water,soil, fans, light, humidity, etc.so I'd probably just screw it all up anyway esp. considering things don't go right for me or work out, and I was listening to the 22 YR old's podcasts too and she described her concussion headache pain it sounded just like the immobilizing migraines that I used to have, and she seems to have "inherited" my love of chocolate,too,and she revealed a tradition one of her brothers(I suspect the 26 YR old?) established Midnight at Easter( after fasting) called Feast Of A Thousand Kings  where all the kids would come downstairs when the adults were all asleep and put a big spread of food out on the diningroom table and have a feast. I never knew about it at the time but I do now! I also decided when people ask me if I'm a man or a woman I'm just going to reply, Does it matter? I'm a person.

Every time I see one of my friends getting the vaccine I'm so disappointed as well and sad that they fell for mind control and gov't propaganda and sadly everyone that had it could possibly be dead within 5 years too(or at the very least sterilized), so that's something like 80% of the population( but then again, population control is  the goal of the Great Reset and the New World Order with an aim to get it down from 7.5 billion to 1 billion) dead and only 20% left, the free-thinkers the only ones left, the ones that didn't "buy" what the gov't is trying to "sell" us, and my hubby actually thinks no one had a cold or Flu all year either when really they did but they were all just re-named and re-branded as COVID so they could get their numbers up in their statistics to scare people into submitting to the restrictions and lockdowns and into getting the vaccine.and it worked; the majority of sheeple "fell" for it, except for the minority that actually question things and think.

Leo Tolstoy: “There is no happiness in life, there are only its flashes. Cherish them".