Barf Out!

I am sooooo sick with this virus, oh, my God, I don't ever remember being this sick I honestly feel like I'm dying!! I have it worse than anyone else in the house did; I barfed my guts out yesterday( no one else barfed) I think due to the pain of my splitting headache and only stomach acid and bile came out as my stomach was empty as being so sick I have zero appetite and don't feel hungry so I didn't eat anything yesterday except for one piece of peanut butter toast in the morning but being a fasting Lenten Friday it worked out well at least. Try and look for the good things. I also squirt out liquid diarrhrea( none of the others had that,either, just me) 6-8 times so far as well, so I'm getting it at both ends, and the headache is the worst; it feels like my head is going to explode and I wondered if I even might have meningitis between the killer headache, the sore, stiff neck, the vomiting,and the high fever. I debated going to the hospital I'm so sick but then decided against it because just in case, I want to die at home, not in the hospital.With the fever I alternate between chills and sweats and when I get the sweats my entire shirt gets soaking wet and my face is always bright red too like a sunburn and my arms feel so weak I can hardly even feel them, like they've almost gone numb, plus I also have all-over body aches and my ears really hurt and I just feel so restless as well and when I took my BP it was really high,too: 170/94 (normal is 120/80) which might also explain the bad headache, but oddly my heel doesn't hurt any more all of a sudden( at least for yesterday and today anyway) which is good, unless, of course it means it was a blood clot and it travelled from my heel up into my head and that's  what's causing the headache.... in any case I doubt it's COVID though as I still have my sense of taste and smell.

The Pope also finally apologized to the Indigenous People for the Church's role in the Residential Schools and nothing can never "make up" for it but at least it's some accountability and acknowledgement, and this morning Buddy shit on my foot as well and it was a big soft squishy one and I was wearing Crocs( don't laugh or judge me; I know they're ugly but they're also comfortable!) and the shit went thru the holes onto my sock! I also heard a rustling sound yesterday and I followed the noise and it ended up being a mouse in one of our recycling boxes! I don't know how it got in there though! Normally I'd just pick it up by the tail and put it outside but I'm just too sick to even do anything and,in fact, just typing this little post wiped me out and I have to go lie down and rest.

Of all the words of mice and men, the saddest are, "It might have been."-Kurt Vonnegut