Mr. Handsome.

I took this photo of the 28 YR old yesterday because I wanted to capture his handsome face.Plus, his hair also looked extra good. He also loves himself so much as well he even kisses himself in the mirror.😂 Last night he also went out to a nightclub or somewhere until late and I told him to make sure he arms the security system when he gets back( because I was already in bed) and he said he would but of course he forgot.(he has like an Alzheimers brain even though he's young; I think from all the concussions he's had)...and also left pretty well every light on in the house. He never tells me where he's going or what he's doing,either, and it worries me to no end and I understand he's an adult and needs his privacy and doesn't want to be "reporting" to his mother but at the same time it worries me,too, what if he got into some kind of trouble; runs into some bad people, or gets into a fight, or gets robbed, or into an accident of some sort, and I'd have no idea where to even tell the police where to begin looking for him. The worry of a mother never ends, not even once they grow up. It's a life-long sentence. He also said my mother and I "get along better now" as well as well and it's true; we do now she's not here living with us anymore and interfering, over-stepping boundaries with my kids, and constantlty criticizing me, being demanding, pestering, complaining, dividing my hubby and I, always taking his side, being bossy,controlling,etc. It was an answer to my prayer.

There's also a dinky country fair nearby and they have "exciting" events like tractor pulls( oooohh!) and the other day I also saw something actually cool: paratroopers jumping out of a plane with their bright neon orange parachutes and men were literally falling from the sky! It's like that song; it's raining men!Hallelujah! I also noticed yesterday a big lump at the back of my lower left leg now as well, the size of an egg, so I wonder if it's a bloodclot maybe, and I'm worried about Buddy,too, as yesterday he didn't eat at all (not even his faves. steak and pepperoni)and was lethargic all day and hardly moved at all but just lay in the same spot, and life without him is meaningless; he's all I have; he's my everything  and my only reason to live, and if I only have 1 friend I'm glad it's him and I should get 2 dogs and then I can tell my hubby I have twice as many friends( because the asshole said I "only have a dog for a friend.") and the therapy dog at the hospital the other day they said it has allergy pills that cost 200$! Holy shit! I think vets are just a "racket" to rip people off.

Yesterday my hubby and the 16 YR old also left without even telling me they were leaving and without even saying goodbye and I didn't even have the chance to say to drive safe and to have fun but they treat me like I'm a piece of furniture, and before I had to find someone to make a family with me but now I "just" have to find someone to love me but I don't know which one is harder, and I don't care if I ever have grandkids,either; most people can't wait but I really couldn't care less. I'm not like most people and I've "had" it raising kids and all their noise, their mess, their destruction, the anxiety, the stress, the worry, wrecking my house and ruining my shit,etc. and I have no desire to re-do it all over again, and it makes me shake my head as well how everyone is so "conditioned" and indoctrinated into thinking the wildfires that are burning the world down are so-called "climate change" and "global warning" too when really it's actually the Last Days and End Times  as prophesized in the Book Of Revelation, and that it means we have to get right with God because Jesus is coming back soon.

But you'll be sorry when I'm dead And all this guilt will be on your head I guess you'd call it suicide.-The Police