The Vines.

I was sitting outside on the back porch yesterday and I noticed our vines that they go thru a process of growth as they mature; they start off a green colour and smooth and then progress over time and turn brown and then later turn thicker and rougher, into a bark, and in the photo here you can see all three stages and it reminded me of myself and all the stages I've gone thru in life,too; smooth and green when I was young and naive and happy and used to trust people and then later more "hardened" and turned brown with more "armour" and hardening from hardships,traumas, betrayals, and trials in life, developing a "thicker" skin, stronger and not as easy to break, and then finally really thick and rough,jaded, and jagged, harder to get thru and to penetrate, built up a stronger, better, harder defense, from having weathered the storms of life over the decades, with a really thick hard scaly bark on the outside, protecting the sensitive inside. I also had a revelation before that I would see Monarch butterflies before I die,too, and I saw one in Toronto at the "Ex"(and I'm still all sore and hurt today from all the walking) 3 days ago and another one just yesterday in the yard as well and it even landed on a vine right in front of me and stayed there for several minutes, and my trip said no refunds or cancellations as well so if I die before I can get to go then the 28 YR old will just have to take my place instead.

The 28 YR old is also learning Mandarin and I know quite a bit as well, just picked it up from hanging around my friend J and her family(who are from Taiwan) for years  from age 12-17 and he also got 3 new Swarovski crystal figures to add to his collection; a pegasus, a unicorn,and a Chinese dragon, and Chinese dragons don't have wings, unlike the Medieval ones, and he liked my pineapple glass as well and asked where I got it and I told him, I stole it from the restaurant and he laughed and said then he can steal it from me,too, as if something is  already stolen then it can also be re-stolen,but no way; I'm using it for a flower vase, and I also had a realistic dream I met Sinead O'Connor and she was singing for me, and when I woke up I couldn't wait to tell people, You'll never believe who I just met! but then realized it was just a dream(unless, of course, I actually did "cross over" to the Other Side in my sleep when the "veil" is thinner) and I think I must also be the only person too that doesn't have a fave. dinosaur.My mother also said I give her flowers now because  she "won't be having a funeral and can enjoy them now while she's still alive" and her room-mate is gone now  and I bet by the time I visit her later today she'll already have a new one!

I also heard Yevgeny(the Russian form of "Eugene"; it sounds so much better in Russian, doesn't it?) Prigozhin (The Wagner mercenary boss that tried to "overthrow" Putin and the Russian army 2 months ago) was killed in a plane crash yesterday, along with his right-hand man and 8 others, making me think Putin finally "got" him ,probably an explosive on the plane, which isn't too hard to fathom esp. since he was the head of KGB, either that, or else he "staged" his death and is just hiding out somewhere and started a new life so they'd stop looking for him? In that world anything is possible. I also have to go to the bank and exchange my $$$ for USD to take on my trip and exchange it for Dominican Pesos there as you can't take their $$$ in or out of the country, the same as in Russia, Jamaica, Cuba, etc.common in many countries, and I bet even the Peso is worth more  than the useless shitless worthless Canadian dollar, 

I also read in a blog she wrote about her cheating narcissist hubby, He is not my 'husband'; we are simply parenting our kids together  and that's exactly how I feel about my hubby,too; I have nothing invested emotionally in our marriage and it just feels like we're room-mates, and not even really like co-parents since I'm never incl. in their Little Circle, never consulted,asked, or told anything or included, or asked my opinion and they just do what they want and decide on their own,I'm always the last to know or be told anything, and my opinions,thoughts, needs, etc. don't matter; I've never been a part of anything.We just happen to live in the same house but live separate lives.

They win, you lose.-Alice Cooper.