Sandcastles At The Beach.

I asked the oldest what he did for his birthday and he said he's getting old ( turned 34) and said he just spent the day resting and it was a good day. He also surprised me by saying he still remembers that time we went to the beach  when he was a baby and we were building sandcastles and some kid came by and tried to knock them down and I told him to f*ck-off. I can't believe he still remembers that; he wasn't even quite 2 years old yet, and I can still clearly remember that day because it was exactly the day before my hubby helped his sister kidnap the oldest girl (because she had 4 boys and wanted a girl but couldn't have any more kids) when she was 9 months old and they're 13 months apart making him 22 months old.  at the time and I was also just newly 3 mos prego with baby # 3 and had bad morning( but for me it was all-day) sickness and  I had to call the police, get a lawyer and go to court and get a court order and a warrant and the police apprehended her and brought her back to me( they had her for 2 weeks) and she came back to us really traumatized with signs of sexual abuse and I NEVER let his sister see the kids ever again. It was a real nightmare and a time I will never forget.My hubby and I separated for a time as well after that and he(unsuccessfully) tried to get custody of the kids but eventually reconciled.At least for the oldest all he remembers from that day is a fun day at the beach but for me it was much, much more.

This is also funky jeans I like and today is child # 5's birthday and he's 29. One of my cousins in Europe also has his birthday today,too, he's 22,and the 29 YR old said he doesn't like birthdays because "something bad always happens on his birthday" and when I asked him for examples he wouldn't tell me and said it was "personal" and that he doesn't know me well enough and we haven't built up that trust yet and it really hurt me and felt like a knife in my heart. he's one that I'm closest to(or at least I thought I was but people always mean more to me than I ever do to them) and get along well with, and I grew him inside me and he came out of my body, so how much more personal  can it possibly get? I just hope Buddy and I don't die today,though, or that would be a bad thing to happen on his birthday, and my back pain is sooo bad too it's getting worse and nothing relieves it and it feels like my spine is going to snap and I wonder if there's maybe even a tumour or something pressing on it and I feel increasingly tired and weak as well and yesterday even saw flashes like with the old-fashioned camera flash, and 3 bright white flashes at first I thought were lightning  and even a bright spot like the sun so am I seeing "glimpses" of the Other Side,getting close to passing-out, or going blind? There's also a strong skunk smell inside the house this morning,too, but not outside, so I hope a skunk didn't come in the house from outside, or maybe the 29 YR old was smoking weed up in his room? He also said he plans on smoking a Cuban cigar  today I brought back from my trip for his birthday too, a special occasion.

I love this lipstick as well( even though I rarely even wear make-up) and I have headphones in this same colour and think a car and an iPod  in this colour would also be awesome, and I noticed a hole at the bottom of my sock and then thought it was in both socks but then realized I just had that same hole-y sock on the other foot, and and online a question was asked What do you think of when you hear "Snoopy?" and it reminds me of when I was 3-4 years old and I accidently left my Snoopy at the cottage in the summer and then during the "off" season it was hit by lightning and burned down and my poor Snoopy was gone and I never forgot it. I also heard now a new car costs on average a whopping 65 K and even a used one costs 35 K; everything is just so expensive people can't afford to live anymore in this shithole, and now a hospital in Gaza has been bombed as well, with hundreds killed, incl. children and reports say Israel did it as well as bombing civilians in the Southern part of Gaza where they told them to evacuate and of course they deny it, and say it was a Hamas rocket that "mis-fired" and this is NOT against the Jewish People or anti-Semitic but the Israeli GOV'T  and killing innocent civilians and wiping out Gaza is NOT "self-defence" and does NOT "justify" hunting Hamas militants and they also are attacking near the Lebanon border  as well, so what's up with that? When will the UN and the rest of the world hold them to account?

I close my eyes Only for a moment, and the moment's gone.-Kansas