Piece Of Shit & Pissed-Off.

I'm sooo mad!!

The dress my hubby ordered for my birthday( shown here above)arrived today.... but it didn't look like in the photo or what I was expecting or hoping for( shown in the photos below).

It was supposed to be of a quilted fabric, have little buttons at the top, and be jagged and zig-zag at the bottom, which is what I liked most about it.

Instead it ended up in real life to NOT be.

Instead, in reality it was made of cheap("muu-muu" -looking )polyester with a print on it, didn't have any buttons and the bottom was straight, not jagged, and the colours weren't as vibrant( esp. noticable on the "sun" part of the pattern). You can see most when I wore it( the photo below) although in the last photo it didn't look as bad but trust me, it photographs better than it actually looks in real life.

I just want to burn it. 

It looks like a cheap rag.

I'm sooo sick of always being ripped-off!

The story of my life.

I tried to write a (scathing!) review online as well but it wouldn't allow me to submt it.

Of course .Just my "luck". Nothing can ever just work out or go right for me.

I also want to return it.

F*ck!

On top of that, I never got the news tonight,either, everything seemed to running 2-3 hours late and they just had lame-ass talk shows and game shows on.

My hubby also said when I see the lawyer tomorrow about the wills to NOT do any "small talk" because they charge by the hour but he doesn't have to worry because I don't do  "small talk", anyway, and I was also wondering if it was maybe even my mother who cleared out the safety deposit box years ago afterall but never told me(we were the only ones who had keys) because she probably also had the mysterious blueprints in there  I never even knew about (or why she had them) and didn't want me to know about? Maybe? It's possible, and it's "funny" too the interesting secrets that are revealed and unfolded after someone dies and the things you find out.

 Everyone has a secret hidden life no one knows about. 

Buddy also bled once yesterday a(just a bit) and so far not at all today and now he just pees and shits on the carpet/floor regularly even though I put him outside every hour, and I heard "foster kids" on the radio but with my bad hearing I thought they'd said "hostage kids!" HA!

I also got an e-mail with a tracking number that the people mailed off my package where I'll have to send off to various gov't agencies along with my mother's death certificate I suppose will likely arrive next week, and my Wordless Wednesday from my blog for today was censored as well; some f*cker reported it( some people just like to cause trouble for other people and can't just mind their own damn business and they can just f*ck right off!!) even though it wasn't even "explicit" but about depression, so they can suck it, and I also hope my mother lets go of the deep hatred, anger, and grudges she's held against my father for the past 56 years as well otherwise it will likely hinder her spirit advancing on the Other Side, and despite all the issues we've had once I had kids of my own we did used to get along before and I choose to remember those times and the fun times we had, such as going to the CNE, Centre Island, musical and theatrical productions, travelling the world, Christmases, etc. and another memory I will always remember and hold dear is sitting in front of our fireplace at our old Toronto house with my friend N in grade 6 playing with our Barbies and our Barbie sticker book. it's times like those I wish I could go back to, revisit,and relive.

Times when I used to be happy.

The Old Me in my Old Life.

Before suicide even was a thought in my head or ever crossed my mind.

The darker the night, the brighter the stars The deeper the grief, the closer is God-IlluminatiBot