Shattered Pieces.

My heart is shattered in pieces.

I don't know how I'm going to live without him. It feels so empty without him and he was my little shadow and was always by my side. I had him sleep beside me in bed last night too for one last time and so I could have him with me for as long as possible and today I'll call the pet cremation place. it took 2 hours for rigor mortis to set in and now he's all stiff and so really, really cold, and oddly now for some reason he's dead he also feels much heavier to carry than before,too.

Heavy just like my heart, sorrow,and grief.

But I will always carry him in my heart forever.

Then it gets worse and you know the last time there was worth living was well in the past.-Chuck Holbrook

Sometimes I imagine I can still hear him groaning and grunting and as couple of times I could have sworn he blinked his eyes, and I'm really going to miss him ,his smell, his cute little tail, and little eyelashes and  how his fur  sparkled and glistened in the sun and now there's no purpose and meaning in life for me anymore.

He was my soul-mate, my heart-dog and one-of-a-kind.

The dog you get and bond with once in a lifetime.

I keep losing everyone I love.

See love through pain.-Janice Hanson

This will also be the first Easter without Buddy and my mother, and I've had 3 losses( them plus my spirit brother) since December and I don't know how much more I can take, and yesterday we got a monthly statement for my mother's line of credit( 8 K left on it, just like the furnace, so 16K we owe to her creditors) so if we keep paying it monthly(80$, and 60$ of which is just interest!)so hopefully her creditors won't come after me( as the executor) and sue me to try and take my house to get their $$ because I certainly don't just have 16k$ to give them.

When we lose someone close to us, a little part us tends to die with them.-Brian.S.Long

My hubby also saw the dentist yesterday, who suggested a mouth guard, which costs 650$ and he said ok as long as insurance pays for it and they said he "grinds his teeth" when he sleeps. I'm pretty sure he has sleep apnea,too. It also snowed last night and now everything is coated in a thin blanket of white and going down to -15C yet next week going tp to PLUS 15 C and higher.

"Today you left for the light in the car and in the sun that you loved so much... You left without pain almost with a smile"..-D.L.

You can literally feel when you don't mean shit to a person.-Idara

Forget people.

They will always fail you. Get yourself a dog.-Richard Donaldson