Worried & Disappointed.

Just the usual in my life: worry, stress, and disappointment:

First off, I'm worried about Beja: this morning when I went to pick him up  he loudly kept yelping in pain ,shivering(he even peed on me!),and ran off cowering in a corner and now he's off hiding under the couch and never even did his Dog Jog  this morning and he keeps shaking in pain so I wonder what it is? Something obviously hurts him when he's picked up or touched but I wonder what it can be, esp. since he was ok yesterday? It's just so sad and I gave him some liquid Tylenol  to feel better but I hope it's nothing serious and that he doesn't die. I can't take any more death or loss; my mother in December, Buddy in April....I just can't take losing Beja,too.(and he's so young,too; at least my mother and Buddy were old) and I can't lose someone else I love, and he's the one who's helping me heal. If I lose him as well that will just push me right over the edge and this time I'll have to make sure I get it right and no margin for error; like electrocute myself or set myself on fire because there's simply nothing left anymore and no reason to live.

I also got a notice  last night in my e-mail from the travel agency about a Jamaica resort last minute deal( 9 September) I've been waiting for to return to my spiritual home for years... with any luck hopefully I'll die there as well....for half price, a good price too like Cuba or Dominican Republic......so I got all excited and was going to contact my travel agent today and book it....it was what I've been waiting for and I haven't been away for 2 years or so and I really need a break,(my hubby goes when I told him, One way?... ha... I wish! ) esp. lately having lost my mother and Buddy I really need to get away for a week.....but then when I checked more into it it wasn't all-inclusive like they normally are; it just incl. the airfare and resort but NOT meals, so forget it.

Disappointed and let-down like always.

The story of my life.

I also like these shirts( shown above) and the youngest came back from camping last night even though I was told not until today so I never had any food cooked and saved for him, and there was yet another school shooting in USA,too, this one at a  Catholic school as they were celebrating Mass, giving a new meaning to the term Mass Shooting and my hubby said I have to switch the laundry detergent I use because the 30 YR old's GF is "allergic to the sheets" and thinks it's the detergent I use.

Pfffffft.

Really?

I happen to like  the detergent pods I use and they don't leave any residue like the powder does. I'm not switching my laundry routine just because his GF doesn't like it.She doesn't even live here. She shouldn't even be sleeping over here. How about this instead: how about he just washes his bedsheets separately himself using whatever special detergent he wants?  I also was saying how math is the bane of my existance and my hubby said he thought he was, and I told him he is the human version of a migraine, and a blog I read the mother in her mid-40's is prego and has really baaaaad sickness even still into her second trimester and one of her girls has taken a semester off college to help her out. Isn't that nice though? My kids would just leave me to die.

If you don't like refugees - stop bombing their countries.-Khaled Beydoun