Happy New Year!

Hey! I haven't seen you since last year, ha,ha!

I woke up last night a few minutes before Midnight as I had to pee so I stayed awake to watch the clock switch over to Midnight and I mumbled Happy New Year to Beja and to myself, but knowing nothing's going to change and it's still just going to be the same old shit, just a different year, different month, different calendar, but still plodding thru each and every day just existing but not really living, just wanting, hoping, and waiting to die, and I really wish Beja could love me like he loves the 31 YR old, esp. since he IS my  dog and he should act like it, but at least he moves out in 3 more days and I get him back, and the other day I had worn a winter sock I hadn't worn since last winter, when Buddy was still alive and it still must have had his scent on it and Beja sniffed it and gave me this sad, almost betrayed look, but now he knows exactly how *I* feel for selling me  out and replacing me with the 31 YR old.

I also made Ambrosia(shown here) for New Years with the real whipping cream ( and now my abdomenal pain is really baaaaaaad, even though I even took 2 lactose pills with it!!) diced cubed fruit, and mini marshmallows. I also plucked out the gross grapes because they're disgusting and I was the one making it.

We also got Chinese food (shown here, and I specially even ordered one with shrimp I know the 31 YR old likes) yesterday for today but mixed up the days. I thought we were to get it yesterday as it's super busy today only it was yesterday  that was the super busy day and it's closed today and we actually should have ordered it on the 30th and my hubby went there at 1 pm(it closed at 8pm last night) and as soon as another customer came in right after him they said they were already all booked until 8pm and weren't even taking any more orders for the entire day so he just made it in time! OMG! Whew! That was close!  Yesterday and today my stomach also hurts really baaaaad as well and I thought if I ate it would feel better but it didn't and then I thought if I smoked some weed it would help but even that didn't,either.

Ugh!

I also took these photos last night as it was snowing and the sky was a pretty light pink but it hardly shows as it was just too dark I guess. The 31 YR old also saw a doctor to be tested for ADHD  and I told him, Oh, I think you have it! and he said, So does the doctor! explaining why he never sticks with anything for too long and quickly grows bored and moves on to the next thing, and due to it he even gets special allowances at the college, incl. an extra hour to complete exams, and he also says it's "not normal" for people to yell when they argue and fight( his therapist must have told him that?) but I've never known anybody who doesn't; what isn't normal is to beat eachother up when you argue and fight but just yelling everybody does ,and he's obviously never met an Italian family then!! Ever since we got the new hot water tank we don't get much hot water,either; even the past 2 weeks I'm the first one up in the mornings and I still have to run it entirely all hot for my bath and I only get half a tub and it runs out and turns luke-warm.

Shit.

Everything we have always sucks and is a piece of shit.

Someone also posted on Twitter that Canadians have hockey rinks in their backyards in winter and someone else replied "Only the low-class ones" and "Hockey fans are the equivalent of inbred cousin-f*cking NASCAR fans in the USA" and I couldn't agree more, and that pretty much sums it up and says it all, and I heard someone a question posed "What would you like the power to do?" and I would like to fly and to be invisible and then I could travel everywhere for free without having to pay airfare or hotel/cruise/resort; just fly there myself any time I want and stay in an empty room for free and no one would ever know. Israel is also now banning some 37 humanitarian groups from Gaza, incl. genuine ones such as Oxfam, Doctors Without Borders, World Vision, etc. clearly violating international law and determined to continue the genocide despite the so-called "ceasefire."

They can suck a big fat one.

Well, I guess the universe knew it wasn’t meant for me.-Ashley Henderson