Finally!!

Yesterday I finally got rid of my old piece of shit computer and thanks to my hubby, the 26 YR old and the 14 YR old I got a new upgraded one( the 14 YR old's old one) and it's soooo nice to NOT have it take 10 minutes to load each page/site, or to hear it make grinding noises, or to have to keep propping up the monitor that always keeps slipping down with wooden blocks, and to be rid of that glare on the old monitor, or to have it keep "freezing" or just shutting down randomly leaving the monitor black....it was slower than Jesus' Second Coming! My hubby copied and saved all my files and the boys set everything up as I have no idea how to do any of that tecnical stuff; I can use the computer but I have no idea how to fix anything if anything goes wrong or how to set things up or how any of that stuff works. That's waaaay beyond me. Life must be so much easier if you're smart. At first I couldn't find my photos or my music( and I have thousands of each!) and I almost had a heart-attack thinking they were all gone but luckily they were just in the wrong spot and the 14 YR old found them and put them in the right spot and re-labelled them so I could find them.My mother said she could tell the new one works much better too because she never heard me curse and swear and yell at it even once like I always did with my other one! HA! I also notice too when I want to type the word "have" I automatically do "habe"(I have= Ich habe); German coming out instead of English and this happens alot, I guess one of the "hazards" of knowing 4 languages; sometimes even when I'm speaking as well; I'll say some words in one language and then use words in another language in the same sentence not even realizing it! I have dreams in other languages too.

Yesterday I also got to have my summer indulgence and treat( because they're so expensive) : cherries! My mother also said if she ever "comes into $$$$" she wants to get the peeling paint on the outside windows painted(it's way too high up for us to reach; we'd have to hire someone) and to get those expensive garbage cans with the wheels on them and I want to get an old-fashioned claw-foot bathtub like we had(and I LOVE!) at our old house in Toronto, and I just realized too that I've been battling depression now for 41 years, since I was 13 and it's just like it's a part of me,now, like my blue eyes, and some days are better,others worse, but it's a daily struggle just trying to survive each day, and I'm so poor and cheap too I have to even scrape off bong residue and smoke it so it lasts longer(waste not, want not)and I could never figure out either why people that live right by the ocean have swimming pools; why do they need a pool when they can swim in the ocean? What I miss the most during the lockdown(as well as loss of freedom) is live music concerts and eating out in a restaurant, and the 26 YR old says he likes staying home normally and doesn't go out much but now that he's being told he has to stay home he doesn't like it anymore, and my friend D(from grade 6) recently left Toronto too and moved out to Prince Edward County(wine country) and bought a vineyard on an empty lot and built his own cool funky house!

I'll never be pretty but I can always be unique.