Reasons I'm a Boomer.

My kids always laugh that I'm a Boomer, aka out-of-touch old person and here are some reasons why:

- I have never had a cell phone and have no need for one since I'm pretty much home most of the time anyway and I have no one to call,plus with my social phobia I don't like talking on the phone anyway, and texting isn't for me and the letters  and keys are way too small for me to see anyway and my stubby fingers clumsily hit the wrong ones and I'm so slow it takes forever and is frustrating as hell, plus cell phone rates in this country cost waaay too much, with the average 100$ a month and I can't afford that. It's not something I need.

- I still have the old-fashioned phone plugged into the wall with a jack.

- I don't understand the new Smart  technology and my appliances are even smarter than I am and I always need my hubby or the kids to help me with stuff like that.

- I still have a watch with actual numbers and hands on it, not digital.

- I have no idea how to do any of that e-banking  or Paypal or e-transfer or any of that stuff. I just use a credit card for everything.

- I have no idea what crypo currency even is or the vaguest idea how it even works. The whole thing just confuses the hell out of me.

- All my devices and appliances( TV remote, computer, iPod, washing machine, etc.) all have way more features on them that I'm even aware of and I don't even use. I just use the basic ones, like mute and volume on the remote, play music and take photos on the iPod,etc.

- Music I listened to in highschool is now being referred to as Classic Rock on the radio.

- Musicians I grew up listening to (Tom Petty, David Bowie, Rick Ocasek, Prince, Eddie van Halen, etc.) many of them are dead now(and not too much older than me) and it makes me feel really old,too.

- I think the music today sucks( the only good music was in the 60's, 70's,and 80's) although that's actually true though, the music today really does suck!!( all that auto-tune crap ,pussy-Pop crap and no one even writes their own songs anymore,either)

- Words I grew up using have entirely different meanings now( and some you can't even use anymore) such as the word gay , as in That's so gay!  back in the 70's and 80's it meant stupid or lame  and not in the LGBT way,and the word lit, back then if you said I'm so lit!  it meant stoned but now means something else.

As well, I was hoping to sleep in a bit this morning since it's raining and dull out but Buddy woke me up early saying he had to go out to shit which he did, a big bloody diarrhrea( it must be from either the beef roast from Sunday or the pepperoni) but the blood isn't actually in  the shit indicating internal bleeding; it comes out after like irritation in his ass, and I also got a Facebook Friend request from Jesus  too but obviously not the original Jesus but I still thought it was funny, and my friend's son is now 5 weeks in the hospital but improving as he's now able to speak and he's been moved out of the ICU into another room, and the 26 YR old's still on a waiting list to have his hair cut,too; there's something like 145 other people on the list ahead of him and I bet by the time they get to him they'll have us in lockdown again!If the neighbours had to describe me they'd also probably say something like: fat middle-aged woman with a shaved head and tattoos that sits outside and sunbathes topless and smokes weed.

The 14 YR old also always hide(or throws out) my  stuff from the groceries as he's bringing them in from the car too and yesterday it was my meat I couldn't find and I eventually found it buried deep and hidden in a bunch of bags that had been all folded up and put away and he's just so aggravating and annoying, and my mother always adds Coke  to the list too and I erase it as with her diabetes she's NOT even supposed to have it and yesterday I saw her sneaking one and she confessed that she sneaks them and she has a stash hidden! It's just like an alcoholic hiding booze! I guess sticking to her diet didn't last long!  Next week I would normally be going to to the CNE (The "Ex") too  and it's always the highlight of my year and I look forward to it every summer but with it cancelled for the past 2 years it doesn't even really feel  like summer anymore and I feel so cheated and ripped-off, and I really miss it.I always love being back in Toronto,too, and for awhile I feel like the Old Me with my Old Life back and even just for that one day I feel like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon.

In chess, as in life, opportunity strikes but once.- David Bronstein

-