Monday, February 20, 2023

The Scars Of Childhood.

I got this from Quora:

It's the same from being bullied,too:

In no particular order:

  • Conditional love and acceptance.
  • Fear of abandonment.
  • low self esteem and self confidence.
  • An inner voice that is overly critical of one’s self.
  • Constantly apologizing to people for everything, even trivial things.
  • Fear of raised voices and loud sounds.
  • Fear when someone raises their hand quickly.
  • Anxiety stronger than any medication made for it.
  • Social awkwardness.
  • Self deprecating sense of humor or dark humor to hide our pain.
  • Fake smiles that do not reach our eyes when we pretend not to be hurt by something.
  • Confusion over compliments or kind words aimed out direction.
  • Never feeling good enough.
  • Hating to show weakness or vulnerability.
  • Extra-sensitive to rejection or perceived rejection.
  • PTSD
  • Wanting approval from friends and family but afraid to believe it if we receive it.
  • We wonder what loving parents and a happy home would be like.
  • A void where love for parents would otherwise be present.
  • Fear of parenthood.
  • Always feeling inadequate. Never being good enough.
  • Fear of trusting others.
  • Envy of friends in normal families.
  • Hatred for pretense and fakery. Even though sometimes we ourselves pretend to be okay when we are not.
  • Inability to stop loving someone we truly care about, because we know the pain of being abandoned.
  • Tenacity. Stubborn. Determination and an unwillingness to give up or be broken.
  • Visceral anger to seeing someone mistreat a child.
  • A hope, however small, that someone will one day see us for who we are and love us anyway; unconditionally. Just as we are willing to give that unconditional love to someone worthy.
  • Knowing we’ll never receive an apology for our childhood or closure for our pain. Or answers to our questions.

I’m sure there’s more. I understand all of these things and I know others do too. We are lifelong members of a club we never signed up for or wanted to be in. We survived.


 

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