Those with Aspergers Syndrome do not make much of an effort to keep up appearances. Whether it’s house keeping, their car, or personal grooming, an Aspie will make a rational decision by weighing the time and effort invested in such tasks against the return they get in efficiency and functionality. For instance, an automobile does not function any better if it is washed and waxed therefore it should only be done when the resale value is a concern.
But then you say, “Don’t they know how it looks to others?” The answer to that question is no. Much of keeping up appearances is done to solicit a positive emotional response from others. Even those that are neurologically typical (normal) are often unaware why one person’s appearance or belongings appear better than another’s. The sensory information a neuro-typical person receives is colored emotionally much more than that of an autistic. And this emotional coloring takes place before perceptions are formed. It is hard wired and gives us empathy or the ability to see things as others do. It also makes decisions less rational.
When people do not have a rational answer as to why they don’t like someone’s appearance or actions they will describe them as inappropriate, weird, improper, odd, or incorrect. If pressed further for a rational answer as to why they don’t like the appearance or actions, they will avoid answering the question by telling you what they believe the appearance or action should have been.
Aspies perceive neuro-typical people as vain, petty, deceptive, shallow, political, visceral and of a herd mentality.
We may never be able to perceive each other the same way. None the less, hard wired or not, we can still learn each other's values by observation.
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