Fading.

Yesterday my hubby picked me up this nice pumpkin bread scented candle.

I'm starting my pumpkin spice season.

But it's bittersweet as it also means summer is ending.

It feels like everything is fading.

My tan is fading.

The sun is fading.

Late sunsets are fading.

Summer is fading.

Our outdoors time is fading.

Fading.

Fading away.

Just like me.

I also saw Beja chasing after that poor battle-scarred chipmunk I saw several days ago I thought would have been dead by now and then a horrible thought occurred as well: I hope it wasn't him that mauled it like that in the first place!  I've had several Chihuahuas in my life and they've never had such a strong prey drive before; only Buddy did but he was a Dachshund; a hunting dog with the instinct for prey but it's unusual for a Chihuahua.

Maybe he's just a bully?

I still have that splitting, blinding, massive headache that feels like my head's going to explode, like the top's going to blow off, like a volcano, and my BP was 150/100, which is high, but I've had much worse, over 200 before.Imagine how much worse it would be if I wasn't on meds?

Yesterday something odd also happened: as I was walking Beja I saw my hubby drive by our house wearing his orange shirt and it was clearly him....only he was supposed to be playing pickleball at the time and when I mentioned it he insisted he was and that I must be "imagining" things but I know what I saw....

so what happened?

My guess is maybe he was "sneaking" around and got caught.

Maybe he was at pickleball initially but then went after to see his mistress( he didn't come home until 2 hours after I saw him drive by and was gone 4 hours in total) but when he got "busted" ( he assumed I was in the backyard) had to deny it and he's always "gaslighting" me and trying to make me doubt my sanity, so.....

Instead of trying to change his wife, he changed the environment.