Friday, January 3, 2020

Ambrosia.


This year we had the 16 YR old make the Ambrosia ( made with real whipping cream, chopped fruit and mini marshmallows, pictured here) for New Year's and it was her first time doing it and I was really impressed how well the cream turned out; she whipped it to exactly the perfect consistancy; not too runny and not so thick it turned to butter and I was really impressed as it's a fine art that takes years of practice to perfect like my mother and I have got down pat after decades of practice using the electric beaters. It takes a good 10 minutes of so of beating and we can tell when it's whipped exactly the right way by looking and feeling; once it makes "peaks" but it has to be precise or else it collapses with too much air if you don't do it long enough and it gets all runny but if you do it too long it turns to butter but she got it perfect on her first try which is unheard of.

Then she told me her secret. She used the Kitchen Aid mixer which apparantly has a setting on it to whip real cream and it does it automatically to just the right consistancy. Aww, shit. I wish she hadn't told me that. So disappointing. All this time I thought she had a natural "gift" andhad no idea the mixer did it for her. I guess now that is a dying art now too, like Cursive writing. It was funny too her relaying the story of my mother asking her at first if she knew how to use the electric mixer, the beaters, the Mixmaster ( forgetting we now have the newer Kitchen Aid mixer) only she kept referring to it as McMaster (which is actually a university) and the poor 16 YR old had no idea what she was talking about and my mother kept getting really mad at her and yelling at her thinking she was playing dumb and just giving her a hard time pretending not to know what she was talking about and she was like, What are you talking about? McMaster is a university!

I also asked one of the kids if they could smell my lavender candle and he said no, if must be a quiet smell. Quiet smell. I love that. I don't know how a smell can be quiet when quiet refers to sound, or rather, lack of sound, but it sounded cute. I know he meant a faint smell but it was cute. My mother also always has her walker in the way so that people always trip over it, or it's blocking a doorway and when I mentioned it she snapped, Hopefully soon I'll be gone and you'll have to find something else to complain  about! and tomorrow is my birthday as well and I doubt they even ordered me a cake at the bakery and it would be kind of "cool" if I died today too, just one day before and for the past 3 days I've had this bad heacache too that I wake up with as well as a stiff sore neck, cough, and pain in my upper back in-between my shoulder blades which is new as usually my back pain is in the lower back and nothing worked to get rid of it except for weed so once my hubby went out I smoked a bowl but he came back early and "caught" me so the weed got rid of one headache but he created another.

I also noticed Buddy has swelling on one side of his snoot but it later went away so maybe something bit him, or it's an infected tooth or he hit it on the table or something jumping off the couch, and I was disappointed as well to see the Pope slapping a woman's hand when she grasped at him in a crowd as well; he should have shook her hand instead and not slapped her and he has this really mean, nasty look on his face too, like revealing that deep down inside he's a nasty old man, as if he let the "mask" slip, and that's not what Jesus would do and I was disillusioned. No one is who they appear to be. Everything is just maya, an illusion.

Wednesday, January 1, 2020

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!





Wordless Wednesday.


Thought For The Day.


Memories.


I saw this photo and I recognized this place ; this street. Not only did I recognize it, but I remembered it; I remembered very clearly walking down it, on a regular basis, I remember living there.

Except I never did.
Not in this lifetime anyway.

But I did. In some time, some place, some lifetime, sometime long ago. I can also remember there being a bridge with water further down and my house being just over that bridge. I also know it's in Europe, either Germany, Austria or Switzerland but my heart tells me it's in Germany, somehwere near Bremen....and so I desperately searched to find the location and it turns out it's Rothenburg Germany, in the Bavaria region.....and guess what.....it's just a 45 minute drive from Bremen.

Holy shit.

I have been to Germany before, but to Frankfurt. I have also had similar experiences with London and Moscow. For years I've had recurring dreams of certain streets in both cities and when I eventually did travel there I found myself on those same streets and they were the exact same as in my dreams and I instinctively knew where they went and I knew where I was;I recognized and remembered it, like I had been there before even though it was my first time there....or at least in this lifetime. This sort of thing happens to me alot, even when I was a kid and I can clearly remember when I was about 3 or 4 being somewhere (I forget where it was) and telling my mother it was familiar and I'd been there before and she kept insisting I hadn't but I knew it and remembered it. As for Rothenburg, it might also explain my European spirit and why it's so deeply ingrained into my soul and I've always felt deeply connected to it, even beyond my ethnic European background.

Today also starts a new year and I woke up with a bad headache (I often wake up with headaches but this one is bad) so I'm off to a "great" start already and the other day the 25 YR old ordered an entire pizza just for him too and never shares with anyone else and I asked him for just one slice and he refused even when I reminded him I brought him back food from my early birthday lunch(and that stuff was expensive,too!) and that I share, and then he goes and twists it all around saying I only share expecting something back in return and I told him it's not like that and explained that it works both ways though; that it's reciprocal; it's give and take; it shouldn't always be one person that gives and another that always takes(like him) and if he never shares no one will share with him,either but he still devoured the whole thing himself and never shared and with our Chinese food we got my mother said she even considered not giving him any since he never shares but she decided against it in her "goodwill" ( ha ha) not wanting to "be like him." so he got lucky THIS time but he still hasn't learned his lesson.

Today's Musing.