Some Assembly Required.

Yesterday I tried the new limited time Tim Hortons  chicken parmesan flatbread pizza (shown here) and it was ok but kind of bland and didn't really have much flavour but luckily it came with a dip that made it a bit better but Buddy didn't mind it though. He esp. liked the s-called chicken that tasted like sawdust.We also got to spend the day outside and it wasn't too hot( only got to 20 C) so even Buddy wasn't too hot and  I could tan for something like 5 hours and as I was sitting out on the back porch a squirrel came right up to me and kept nattering, angrily demanding food,too, so I told it if it's going to be a greedy little bastard with an attitude like that then I'm NOT going to give it anything and our grass in the backyard is easily over 3 feet tall now( maybe even taller) and I don't know when the part for the lawn mower is ever going to come!

We also got these lights for the backyard garden (we used to call MoonRays) my hubby had to assemble but he only did 6 out of 10 so far. They're solar powered, like the ones we used to have at our old house in Ottawa. We had some at the front and some at the back but here we'll just do it at the back because people steal everything here in this redneck town. I decided I'll put them alongside the pool, in-between the pool and the lawn, but can't until the grass finally gets cut(whenever that is.) Other than that there's not really too much going on other than my hubby leaves today for his chess tournament in USA over the weekend giving me a break,too!

Yahoo!!

I just feel so free when he's not here.

I also like these cool funky shoes, and yesterday my cousin went SCUBA diving in the Red Sea I think is pretty  awesome. I've been to the Red Sea, but not deep sea diving, just sailing. I also figure with the kids not wanting anything to do with me that it's probably also best and the most loving thing to do for me to just  let them go as well since they don't want me in their lives ,anyway,and to be honest if that's how they're going to treat me then I'm better off without them,anyway.This way they get what they want and I've released them and put it all in the past behind me and am now free to start over again and start a new life of my own,too.Before, losing the kids used to be my biggest fear and yet now it's sort of like I have lost them but I'm ok. I've accepted it.I've moved on. 

 I survived.

I'm a survivor.

It's what I do.

I've started over so many times before anyway so what's one more time,right?

This is also My Boy enjoying outside yesterday and I saw this funny thing online too saying to write down the last thing you did and then add at the end....for the glory of the empire so I wrote, I took a big shit for the glory of the empire  and another that said to quote a famous movie quote and then add, you piece of shit at the end so I did, Bueller...Bueller...Bueller... you piece of shit and I wonder as well why Pride gets a whole month all to itself; what about all the other sins? How come adultery, theft, murder, envy, malice, avarice, sloth, etc. don't have their own months as well? How come only pride is glorified and promoted? How about the other sins?

So I'm not bad, I'm damaged ,but healing. My trauma does matter. What created me does matter.-Maddox Mache