Truth For The Day.

 

What A Day!

Yesterday was quite a day! The good  thing was the bath-bombs I ordered arrived and this morning I used the egg-shaped one that turned the bath water orange( I tried to take a photo but it ended up all blurry) and left gold glittery sparkles on my body my hubby said looked like rust and I was 'rusting" ( ha, ha, but good analogy though)...but the bad  was first my hubby had screwed-up my mother's income tax and put down the wrong birthdate( he'd wrote June instead of July) so the revenue agency locked her account thinking she got hacked so he had to call them and it was a whole lot of back-and-forth he had on the phone with them trying to un-do his mistake and they had to talk to her to verify it really was her, etc.

and then there's the really big one:

When we got up yesterday my hubby noticed it felt cold in the house and checked the thermostat and it was at 62 F ( we keep it at 70F) so he cranked it up thinking someone had turned it off by accident....but even hours later it hadn't changed so I said the furnace must be broken so we called the repair guy who came and checked it and I was right.....and how: he said due to our flooded basement( due to spring meltage and heavy rain) it seeped into the bottom of the furnace and destroyed it plus short-circuited the motor and to replace it would cost 1200$ and it's an old furnace anyway( 15 years old) and at the end of its life-span and starting to fall apart bit-by-bit as it is anyway( just like me; once one thing goes they all do, starting with my gallbladder and progressing from there) so they could fix it temporary and just keep coming back for more repairs...or just get a new one with a 10 year warranty and repairs covered so we did that. It cost 8500$ we don't have so we went with their financing plan where we pay just over 100$/ month for 15 years(and by then we'll need another one!) but it's not too likely that either my mother or I will still even be alive by then,anyway.It surprised me too when the guy asked my mother's marital status and she said widow as that's not exactly true; before she had always said separated as they have been since I was 2 but now he's died she says widow even though he had another family? It just didn't sound right somehow...The guy also asked how long we plan on staying in the house and my mother and I said until we die and my hubby said  he's just waiting until she and I die and then he's going to sell it and he goes, No, I don't think I'm going to write that down....

Our A/C is the same age,too( we had them put in together) but can't afford to get that done,too( same price) but my mother doesn't care about that because the A/C is really just something I care about,anyway, and just like the pool they took away from me years ago soon I'll be losing my A/C, too, and the guy for the furnace was here for a whole 2 hours which surprised me and during the loooong discussion he looked over at me and said, You can speak; this involves you,too and I was just floored; no one ever incl. me or asks MY opinion and what I have to say never matters, and it doesn't incl. or involve me but it meant alot to me that at least someone considered me, and when he asked what our total annual income is and my hubby told him I was surprised how much it actually is as we never see any of it and if it's so good then how come we're always struggling so much to even just pay the bills? Where is all this $$$ going ? He said we need a new foundation too but that's 20/30K so that's out of the question, and now it's 52 F in the house but we used space heaters to keep warm and they're putting in the new furnace today and luckily it's not too cold this time of year.

My mother also ordered pizza last night but only got the 2 kinds that her, my hubby,and the 16 YR old like, not from the place I like but from the one that has too much sauce,and not even any of the types I like but the ones I don't even like; not even caring or asking what kind I want, as always I'm left out, not considered, and just treated like a piece of shit to be scraped off the bottom of their shoes.It's like I'm not even a part of this family  and then they wonder why I hate them and want out and am desperate to start a new life on my own elsewhere.

I don't care if it hurts I'm tired of lies and all these games I've reached a point in life no longer can I be this way.-Ziggy Marley

 

Pondering For Today.

 

Goin' Commando.

Today I'm goin' "commando", like a true Scotsman under his kilt: no underwear! It was by accident though and not on purpose; I got dressed into my clean clothes after my bath and hair wash this morning....and I sorted out my clothes to put on and,.....where's my underwear?.....that's weird....where is it? I couldn't find my underwear. It wasn't there with the other clothes. I must have forgotten it when I put my clothes out and so today I'm going around without underwear and it feels really weird. I remember this one time as a kid too I was so excited to go to the Ex ( the CNE) when I got dressed I forgot to put it on( but luckily I had a one-piece jumpsuit) and this other time in the Caribbean when I changed on the beach from my wet bathingsuit back into my clothes there was no underwear; it must have fallen out of my bag, so I went commando the rest of the day under my skirt and it felt nice and breezy and "free".....ok, except for the fact that it was a really windy day and I had to keep holding my white skirt down and then we got torrential rain and it was a white skirt.....then see-thru when wet, so luckily I still had my beach towel I just wrapped around my waist. My hubby also did our taxes( it's waaay too complicated for my mother and I to understand, plus also too much math) and my mother gets a grand total of 14$ back this year but still better than me; I get nothing. They also said on the news the average Milennial is 33 and owes 47 K in debt due to student loans and credit card debt. Yikes! No wonder  they can't afford to buy a home, that plus the cost of homes!

I also figured university was nothing more than just a waste of $$$ on the oldest and the 26 YR old since the oldest hardly even used his degree and then decided he didn't like it and switched careers and the 26 YR old almost made it( just 3 classes left to graduate) and then quit plus university also ruined the kids and made them worldly and turned them away from God and the values they were raised with, and it makes sense too that God sent many prophets to different people in different parts of the world at different times to teach them love and His Word: Buddha to Asia, Jesus to the Israelities and Mohammed to the Arabs, and even now some Orthodox Jewish and Muslim sects think certain people are the modern-day Messiah and it would be like back in Jesus' time, some people believe He was the real deal and others doubting thinking He was just a radical cult leader. and now Israel's PM Netanyahu( that's such a cool name) is a dictator who changed the law so that he can't be ousted despite his corruption and thousands are taking to the street in protest and Ukraine's Zelensky denies war crimes trying to justify  they can "defend" themselves too but that still doesn't mean you can torture and kill innocent civilians and that guy is a wolf in sheep's clothing.

I also think now that our Mystery Flower IS a daffodil like I first thought afterall; now it's 3 times the size( it's amazing what daily water will do) and now it's more mature and bigger it has a sheath on the outer bud now visible now it's bigger, and I wonder too still why my fave. Facebook friend de-friended and blocked me awhile back and maybe she didn't like it I mentioned her in my blog or something but it just means because she was important to me as I mention in my blog things in my life; things that are on my mind or that are important to me or that I care about or think about,concern me, matter to me, or are a part of my life and about the youngest now being 16 the 28 YR old said, with sexual innuendo, Now he's legal! and I replied, Yeah, to drive! but like the 28 YR old, has no interest in doing so, even though most boys that age do, but it must be an autistic thing.

I don't hate life per se, I just hate MY life.

 

Daily Thought.

 

Weekend Update.

I was looking at old photos and came across these old ones from 2011 when my mother and I took the 19 and 21 YR olds on a Caribbean cruise when they were 8 and 10 years old. It was for 2 weeks and the 19 YR old was ok for the first week but she was so horrible  and miserable and bratty and homesick for the second week everyone was so fed-up with her, even me and I was even tempted to either leave her on the ship or ditch her in port. We don't start taking the kids on trips until they're 8 as before they're too young to really appreciate it( even when I took the oldest and the 28 YR old across Europe at 16 and 11 they still slept right thru most of it and acted-up even so) but she had just turned 8 on the trip so maybe she just wasn't old enough? My friend P is currently now in St. Lucia which is one of the places we took the girls to as well and where the 19 YR old got her hair braided in corn-rows, as seen here,too.Isn't she just the cutest thing?

I also smelled ketones in my mother's room yesterday so her glucose level must be really high if I can even smell it coming off her skin, and my mother gave the newly-minted now 16 YR old 100$ in his birthday card as well, to which he exclaimed, Jackpot!! when he opened it up and saw it and the 28 YR old said, I never got any money for my birthday! and I told him neither did I and I'm her child; all she gave me for my birthday was a box of chocolates, but  we all know that the 16 YR old is her favourite and they put out the annual Sunshine List too "outing" public servants who earn 100K a year or more, almost as if they're trying to "shame" them,  and I don't see the point of it; I don't think it's anybody's business how much income people make, and yesterday we had lots of snow, ice pellets and then torrential rain( so much for spring!) and now our kitchen ceiling's leaking again,too.

Here is the 21 YR old at age 10 when we took the tour on the old pirate ship. I think it was in Tortola if I remember correctly and it was the same ship they used as the Black Pearl  in the Pirates Of The Caribbean movies.and my cousin in Europe got another tattoo, just a month after she got her first one and this one's on her other arm; a witch on a broomstick so she must be into the occult, and tattoos are addictive, like potato chips; you can't just have one, and the 28 YR old taunts I'm "not a woman" now my uterus got removed even though I was born with it and I still have my ovaries( for hormones), boobs, and pussy, and even when a dog gets spayed( uterus removed) it's still a female dog and not a male, and when women get mastectomies(boobs removed) for cancer they're still women and yesterday I was sitting in the livingroom listening to my Flashback 60's, 70's, and 80's show on the radio the 28 YR old comes in and puts the TV on so loud I couldn't hear and then he tells me to leave even though I was there first and his excuse was because he's "cute" and I told him, Age before beauty!

I also have this small tan triangle-shaped birthmark on my stomach that looks like an arrow head, a spear tip and it makes me wonder if maybe that's how I died in a previous life; I was stabbed and that's my scar, and I'm thinking our mystery flower might be a crocus afterall(even though it looks big for a crocus) and not a daffodil(the leaves are similar but the buds are still closed so until it blooms we won't know for sure) as daffodils have a "sheath" on them and these don't,and it's sad too to realize that nothing in life is permanant; everything is just temporary; friends, love, happiness, security, etc. nothing lasts forever.

My world is small and my hopes are few.

 

Sunday Sayings.

I found the perfect store for me!😂

...after you wiped the knife on your ass first.

Yup, I still do.

...and farts glitter.

While there is relative good & bad, there are no pure angels in war. Beware those who say they are.-Elon Musk